The 4 types of internal dialogue that you should avoid

We all, at some point in our lives, go through painful moments. or unexpected situations of a negative nature that we must overcome. However, these types of experiences mark some people in such a way that they develop a internal dialogue of a negative nature.

This dialogue is not recommended in itself, but it is even more dangerous when it threatens to stay and become a habit. The truth is that no one is exempt from finding themselves facing a problem that they are unable to solve.

This inability to solve the problem may be due to its complexity or because we do not have sufficient tools to solve it. Under these circumstances, and If we value the problem as important, it is normal for anxiety to appear: the challenge has become a threat.

Anticipatory anxiety

In this type of disorders it is common to have internal dialogues that reinforce negative ideas. and that return us to the painful episode that we have not yet overcome. The worst thing is that in the face of each new experience that reminds us of what happened, we begin to react negatively, considering it potentially dangerous.

Anticipatory anxiety is the main component of this type of thinking dynamics when they have established themselves in us. From here, the person develops distorted statements that are constantly repeated and increase the initial anguish, until it becomes intolerable.

When people suffer from distress and anxiety, They usually develop an internal dialogue of a catastrophic nature. Of course, this view of life is the product of an altered and, therefore, distorted emotional state. The danger that this situation poses is that, If not corrected in time, it can become a vicious circle. which will worsen over time, potentially causing a panic attack.

Panic

The characteristic symptoms of a panic attack include tightness in the chest., tachycardia, dizziness, sweating in the hands and palpitations. In biological terms, this is a mammal’s normal reaction to threat. The person in panic perceives a situation that can be controlled as threatening. Without realizing it, his internal dialogue reinforces his negative and catastrophic ideas. That’s why he loses control and goes into crisis.

The panic attack can escalate and become severe. But when we act effectively at the first symptoms, it is blocked and the person leaves the circle of negative thoughts. This is possible because crises involve learned negative mental dynamics and, therefore, allow modifications if this is our intention.

Internal dialogue: classification

Specialists in the field of psychology have classified these internal dialogues into four. that operate as triggers for anguish or anxiety. These are: the catastrophic, the self-critical, the victimist and the self-demanding.

The catastrophic

Anxiety arises when imagining the most catastrophic scenario possible. He anticipates events (which surely will not happen) and magnifies them. This results in a misperception, which can trigger a panic attack. The essential phrase of this type of internal dialogue is: “everything can turn into a tragedy when I least expect it.”

The self-critic

The self-critic constantly judges himself and negatively values ​​his behavior. Emphasize your limitations and defects. This leads him to make his life unmanageable. He tends to be dependent on others and compares yourself to others to feel disadvantaged. He envies those who achieve their goals and is frustrated by being unable to achieve his own. The preferred phrases in this type of internal dialogue are: I can’t, I’m incapable, I don’t deserve it.

The victimizer

This modality is characterized by feeling unprotected and hopeless.. This leads him to affirm that his condition has no cure, that he makes no progress in his progress. He believes that everything will stay the same and goes through insurmountable obstacles between what he wants and him. He regrets what things are, but does not try to change them.. In the victim’s internal dialogue, statements appear such as: no one understands me, no one values ​​me, I suffer and they don’t care.

The self-demanding

In this condition, exhaustion and chronic stress are promoted based on perfection. He is intolerant of mistakes. Furthermore, he tries to convince himself that his faults are due to external errors and not to him.

You get worn out thinking that you didn’t achieve your goals. due to lack of money, status, etc., despite being accommodating to everyone. The self-demanding person has an internal dialogue such as: “it is not enough”, “it is not perfect”, “it has not turned out as I would have liked”, etc.

Regaining control

Make us aware of This type of internal dialogue constitutes a great first step to regain control and avoid a negative perception of ourselves or our context, which ultimately only triggers our state of anxiety.

The real change occurs when we begin to detect these negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations. It is important to control our breathing, relax and face situations calmly.. Otherwise, pessimistic and self-destructive attitudes will be perpetuated.

It is not easy to modify this type of reaction to what we consider threatening. But the same thing happens when we want to change a bad habit, such as smoking or eating chocolate excessively. Of course, Changing a bad habit requires determination and effort, but it can be achieved if we put enough effort into it..

How to have a positive internal dialogue?

First of all, The benefits of establishing positive internal dialogue are associated with better stress control, healthier self-esteem, greater self-knowledge and, likewise, greater self-confidence and self-confidence. Of course, to change our internal dialogue it is necessary, as we saw in the previous section, to become aware of the negative way in which we speak to ourselves and, from there, begin the process of change.

Some tips that may be useful are changing the “should” to the “could”, this makes us perceive more control over our actions and feel more autonomous and empowered. In the same way, Focusing attention on possible solutions to a conflict situation, rather than on the conflict itself, will help us think more positively.be less pessimistic and move beyond complaining to orient ourselves towards action.

You might be interested…