My partner needs to be right all the time: what can I do?

“My partner needs to be right all the time, anything is taken out of context and becomes the subject of discussion.” There are many people who live this reality daily in their relationship. These are situations of high psychological exhaustion because in the end a large amount of time and energy is invested in dialectical debates that rarely lead anywhere.

We have all heard the famous saying that Two will not discuss if one does not want to. However, There are many personality profiles that push us into these encounters., to those disagreements that take away our spirit and desire for almost anything. This is particularly common in those who are obsessed with proving that their truth is the only truth and that their point of view is the only acceptable one.

What is the cause of this psychological reality, is it pure and simple narcissism? Lack of emotional intelligence? Or an obsessive desire to reinforce one’s own identity? Understanding what is behind these behaviors is sometimes complex. However, beyond the reasons is knowing how to act in these circumstances, especially when they occur in our relationship.

The need to be right, the voice of narcissism and low self-esteem

He said Blaise Pascal who e He who believes he is right among all things, the reason for things does not know. That is the real key. Most of us do not hesitate to stand our ground when necessary. However, we are aware that sometimes we make mistakes and even more so, that it is good to be humble enough to assume that we do not know everything.

However, those who find fault with everything and are a master at dotting the i’s are exhausted. The person who makes judgments as he breathes and also lacks this intellectual humility, wears out. Therefore, When one complains with great despondency that “my partner needs to be right all the time” it means that a limit has been reached.

However, Why happens? What explains this persistent need to have the last word on any matter? We analyze it.

The personality that is obsessed with always being right

Dr. Samantha Dashine from the University at Buffalo (United States) came to an interesting conclusion through research from 2019. On average, The need to always impose one’s own point of view and be right in every dialogue or situation hides a narcissistic personality.

The psychosocial functioning of the narcissist always goes through deploy defensive strategies to camouflage their low self-esteem. They need, therefore, to make clear their superiority, their intellectual advantage in every circumstance. Being right is almost a survival mechanism and not so much an attempt to “show off.” On the other hand, The mark of excessive ego formulates another reason why my partner needs to be right all the time. The obsession with imposing his point of view is his way of reaffirming a positive and superior image of himself. In addition, and even beyond narcissism itself, there are other causes that we must consider. We live in a society in which failure is pointed out and where positive reinforcement is always sought.. Failing or admitting that one is not right requires an exercise in humility, resistance to frustration and maturity that is not always developed. Finally, there is another dimension that is no less important. Being right is linked to the muscle of self-esteem. If someone questions my truth they are challenging my beliefs and my beliefs are my most valuable possessions.

My partner needs to be right all the time: keys to action

We pointed it out at the beginning, It is not always possible to avoid, avoid or not argue with those who need to be right.. When these situations appear within a couple, coexistence becomes complicated. Sometimes, there is no other option than to defend ourselves, to fall into that dialectical battle, even knowing that we are going to lose our calm and patience.

How to act? What to do in these situations? Let’s reflect on some data.

Stay calm, understand that behind that attitude there is insecurity

Fear of admitting that one is wrong, need to protect self-esteem… When my partner needs to be right, he often does so as a defensive act. That attitude, that of defense, can lead to anger on their part because we don’t agree with them.. Let’s stay calm so we can be above that attitude at all times. Only then will we have control of the situation.

Intelligent, thought-provoking reasoning

Let’s avoid falling into the dialectical battle, the one in which we end up losing our nerve and patience. In these contexts in which it is not always possible for us to avoid discussion, it is appropriate to ensure that the other person is capable of reflecting. For it, It is good to offer them alternatives to their thinking so that they are able to assume other perspectives..

Phrases like:

How did you come to that conclusion?Have you ever considered that maybe…?What do you base yourself on to defend that idea?

In extreme cases, it will be necessary to consider the continuity of that relationship

When my partner needs to be right all the time and doesn’t listen to my opinion, he is not respecting me. If only your truth counts and my perspective, word and perspective do not count, there is a serious problem. Let’s keep in mind, if these situations continue and it is the other person who always makes the decisions, it is necessary to rethink that relationship.

As the old saying goes, sometimes, It is better to be happy than to be right. However, let us remember, Few things bring so much suffering that those who focus their life on constantly defending their truth as a defense mechanism.

You might be interested…