Love at first sight, love in a meeting of glances

Love at first sight is like two glances collapsing. They are two eyes that collide and converge soul with soul from minute zero to stop time. It is also the mystery of an encounter where chemistry orchestrates the attraction, but where connection often emerges, where the bells fly again, where the heart is allowed to restart once again.

The idea captivates, but the reality, sometimes, is something very different. Love at first sight sells, we like it and it shapes that image so repeated in the world of cinema, literature and advertising that fascinates us so much.

Furthermore, in books like Love at first sight: the stories and science behind instant attraction, by Dr. Earl Naumann of the University of Arizona, remind us that more than half of us believe in this phenomenon. That just one look is enough for the imprint of love to ignite, be born and conquer us completely, leaving us breathless.

That neurochemical spark, loaded with uncertainty, desire, mystery and illusion, has its science behind it. Thus, and although in emotional matters not everything can be observed under a microscope or in an experiment room, it can be said that a large part of the work carried out to date tells us the same thing. Love at first sight exists, however, there are a series of conditions that accompany it and that must be kept in mind..

Don’t call it love, call it attraction

There are hasty loves, those that do not know time, that arise in an instant and in the most unexpected spaces.. Love at first sight has always happened and will continue to happen at every moment. Likewise, we also have slow-cooked loves, those that cook slowly and warmly, starting from a sincere friendship to suddenly become an authentic passion.

Love does not obey rules, criteria and orders when it comes to the way in which it arises, we know that. However, if we want to maintain that love that sometimes arises unexpectedly, we do need order, negotiated agreements, and intelligently agreed upon emotional democracy. If we say the latter it is for an obvious reason. In love at first sight, attraction turns on the machinery, not reason..

It is desire and illusion, it is magnetism, it is the halo effect and that chemical shipwreck caused by serotonin and dopamine. It is the gateway that will facilitate a relationship, which will give greater possibilities for that first date to emerge. It is a love that arrives without warning but that will require more thorough maturation afterthe one where mysteries are uncovered with realities, where illusions are put aside to contemplate realities.

Love at first sight: what science tells us

The university of Holland carried out a study in 2017 on this same topic. In the work “What kind of love is love at first sight? “An empirical investigation” followed up on 600 people who had experienced what they themselves defined as “love at first sight.”

Well, of that sample, 92% started a relationship after that meeting, that exchange of glances where the majority were completely certain that they had found someone truly special. The researchers then proceeded to interview each couple to delve a little deeper into certain psychological dimensions.

Love at first sight is related to physical appearance (and something else)

In love at first sight, physical attraction comes together, there is no doubt. Now, it is not always necessary that there be that external and undoubted beauty that captures our attention at the second. Scientists explain that there is something more, something that is transmitted through looks that give each other confidence, sympathy, that connect with comfort and without fear..

The halo effect

As we have pointed out, when two people experience attraction after that exchange of glances, it is more than likely that there will be a first date. However, what happens on many occasions is that after magnetism emerged through the gaze, Let’s start creating a series of ideas that do not always fit reality.

This attraction in turn causes us to project a series of very specific positive qualities onto the other person. We see them more intelligent, nobler, original, reliable and committed. We create a halo effect that, added to the passion, will make that feeling more lasting over time.. Until sooner or later, certain more or less tolerable evidence is revealed.

Love at first sight favors romantics

In the aforementioned study from the University of Holland, it has been seen that a significant part of the sample studied maintains this relationship over time and successfully. That is to say, That love that emerged at first sight lasts on many occasions, matures and settles into a satisfactory relationship.

In most cases, however, The relationship ends when the passion weakens, when the illusion comes face to face with reality and they are not able to reconvert that commitment into a bond based on intimacy.in trust, affection and reciprocity.

Likewise, something that could also be seen in this study is that Many of those couples who had created their relationship from that significant exchange of glances were staunch defenders of romantic love.. For them, aspects such as predestination or the soul mate were obvious facts that explained their success in the relationship.

To conclude, science cannot deny that in certain cases, love at first sight exists and is a triumph. However, in most cases, behind those eyes that meet, discover and connect, what there is is a mere attraction.

Now, the Attraction is always that channel of inexplicable power that acts as the first stepas the first step towards a bond that must mature day by day and go through its own difficulties to thrive in a successful and happy relationship.

You might be interested…