Life doesn’t take people away from you, it takes you away from those you don’t need.

When it comes to safeguarding our self-esteem and our dignity we have to be clear about something: we cannot accept reductions. That’s why we say that life doesn’t take people away from us, but rather it distances us from those we don’t need.

Emotional ties are valuable and, therefore, it is crucial that Let’s leave aside the bad, heartless people who repeatedly undermine our self-esteem. The moment you realize this, a new world opens before your eyes and you stop needing the presence of those who planted doubts, discomfort and reluctance in you.

Give your absence to those who do you harm in your presence

Stay away from those who doubt you, join those who value you, free yourself from those who hinder you and love those who support you. Give your absence to those who do not value your presence and show yourself what you are worth.

You are the one who sets the price for yourself and, therefore, it is that value that will be given to you by interested people who do not see beyond their selfishness and needs. That is why it is important that we stay close to what comforts us and stay away from what deliberately harms us. So:

Stay away from what hurts you, from what darkens your life, stay away from what becomes sinister. Stay away from everything that has no remedy, from that which is subjugating your well-being. Put it emotional distance to pain, rejection and betrayal, observe them and learn. Manage your fears, control your demons.Be aware that suffering is optional.Do not disguise or anesthetize the reality of negative emotional ties for fear of losing. Remember that the rules of the game of your life are those that you decide.

The pain that leaves a mark

When we break ourselves into pieces to keep others whole, we disintegrate our ability to react.. That is, we weaken the emotional determination that shapes our essence. This disconnection with ourselves has disastrous consequences for our emotional health, as we isolate ourselves from reality and undermine our desires.

However, an important assessment is worth making. We can all be toxic people at some point in our lives and in some type of relationship.. However, it is easier to see the speck in another’s eye than the beam in your own eye.

Bad relationships are usually supported by pillars of this type:

The assumption of a victim role. The demanding and jealous tyranny of those who believe they are defending their dignity when it undermines that of others. Jealous attitudes. Excessive attention. Submission. Domination and aggressiveness.

Autotoxicity, inner emotional imbalance

The silent deterioration that occurs when we try to convince ourselves that everything is fine or that something can be fixed is an absolute guarantee of autotoxicity. Thus, we become toxic to ourselves when:

We assume a submissive role in the face of the demands of others. We lose our essence by not attending to our desires and succumbing to the requests of others. We become chronic victimists. We despise our emotions and thoughts, as well as our achievements. We maintain an internal dialogue that is harmful to ourselves and towards others. We don’t value ourselves. We stop looking inward.

As they say, It is essential that before trying to fix the world we take a few laps around our house. We cannot resolve anything without first questioning what role we play in a toxic relationship.

Timely self-criticism is better than a deep emotional wound in our hearts for not having known how to assert ourselves in time.

Do not despair and remember: although it is very difficult to protect ourselves from the hypocrisy and betrayal of those we consider friends, we do have to always keep in mind that although not everything that glitters is gold, we can still trust the world.

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