Is it a good idea to talk to your ex on WhatsApp and try to get him back?

Every relationship ends in a different way.

Some people go their separate ways and don’t communicate again for years, while others try to make things work.

The relationship could end on good terms, because there is still a lot of appreciation, or perhaps for the sake of their children or because they care about each other.

It may have been difficult for you to move on. Surely you have tried to forget it, but your ex continues to haunt your thoughts.

You want him to come back, but you don’t know if it’s for the best.

You feel like you can’t find the right words to say when you talk to him.

Is it a good idea to try to talk to someone you’re still romantically interested in over text?

Here’s everything you need to know and ask yourself before sending him a message.

8 things you should know before talking to your ex on WhatsApp and trying to get him back

1) Go back to the reasons for your separation

There are many factors that can make you question the possibility of sending your ex a WhatsApp:

The connection: there is a general idea that the context of the pandemic has made many question their love relationships, and especially miss past relationships. You are worried about how she is. Having been single for a long time. Boredom. relationship

The first and most important thing you should do is reflect on why it didn’t work the first time?

What made you change your mind about him now?

The mind is very powerful and many times, to allow us to move on, it makes us remember the good things we have experienced more and less remember the bad ones. There are specialists who explain this process.

Then surely you are dreaming of those good times you had together. But what about disagreements, arguments and your differences?

Be sure to be honest and think about whether those differences are something you can really overcome.

2) Think about what your real objective is when contacting him

What do you really want when sending a WhatsApp?

It is important that you are honest with yourself about the truth of your intentions.

Do you want to write to him for something simple, like to know how he is? Do you want to talk to him or just let him know you’re okay?

Or do you want to steer that text contact towards a possible meeting and maybe something else?

You may even want to talk to him again to give your relationship some final closure in your mind.

This will set the tone and whether or not it’s really a good idea to write to him.

If all you want is to send him a message without ulterior motives, because you really care, and you want to know how he is doing, you should not think so much about it and just do it.

But if you are here, there is some doubt in your mind.

Continue reading to find out if it’s really a good idea.

3) How good do you feel now that you are alone?

A second very important point that you should evaluate is, how do you feel being alone?

Can’t stand loneliness or do you really want to be with him? What do you really crave: him or someone’s company?

If you don’t want to be alone, find a friend or someone with whom to share your moments of sadness and happiness.

Never send a WhatsApp message to your ex under the influence of sadness or depression.

Perhaps you are going through difficult times and that makes you feel more vulnerable.

For many, getting back in touch with an ex and trying to get it back is an act of survival or self-help.

But, you don’t need to be with someone to feel good.

You should first feel good about your life and then decide if you still want to message him.

4) Think about how it might affect him

Many times we are so absorbed in our own feelings that we forget that there is a person on the other side, with their own feelings and emotions.

How do you think your WhatsApp could impact him?

Especially if you were the one who decided to end the relationship, this is something that you should consider in depth.

If you really want him, you shouldn’t arouse hopes in him, which can then lead to nothing.

Whether or not he still cares about you, find a way to understand how contacting him might affect him.

Try to be aware of the impact this can have on him.

5) Are you prepared for his reaction?

You can imagine hundreds of scenarios, as their possible responses, to the message you want to send to your ex.

But the truth is that reality is always stranger than fiction.

There are many options:

He might be super friendly and glad to hear from you.
The idea of ​​seeing you could make him very excited. He might think your message is out of place and get angry. Maybe he chooses silence and prefers not to answer you.

Are you sure that you are prepared to deal with any scenario that comes your way?

You will always have a desired option in your mind, but what if what you expect doesn’t happen?

Text him only when you’re ready to, and when you’re sure you can deal with his reaction.

All things cannot be planned, but you should at least be ready for everything that could happen.

6) Has enough time passed to contact you again?

If your breakup is very recent and you’ve agreed to no contact, it might be a good idea to wait a bit before texting your ex.

There is a valid reason why they decided to cut contact and it is time to keep it in mind.

Now, if you feel like a lot of time has passed and the distance hasn’t made you forget, you might decide to send him a message.

It is important that you know that time can help you get over the break and be happy forever, but it is not the only factor that influences that decision.

There is also a lot here about their relationship.

If he still loves you, and you really need to be together, he may step forward at some point and let you know that he still thinks of you.

7) Is it a better idea to talk instead of sending a message? Should you call him?

We all know that text messages distort reality.

Many times they lend themselves to confusion, and we cannot understand the true intentions of the other.

There are people who are more expressive and even funnier by message. In person, they may find it more difficult to show their emotions, or they may be shy.

Or on the contrary, a person could seem very distant or cutting to you by message, when it is not their intention.

Then you should think if it is not better to make a friendly call, instead of sending a WhatsApp message to your ex.

This option is sometimes more direct, and will allow you to know where he is, in a faster and more direct way.

8) Do not write to him again, if he has asked you not to do so

Perhaps you have been through this in the past, without much success.

It may not be the first time you think of writing to him.

But I have to be honest with you here, if you have already tried and he has told you that he does not want you to write to him. You must respect it.

There are things in life that cannot be forced, and the love of a person is one of them.

It is better that you focus on yourself and on being better.

I know it can be hard to forget someone you love, but I assure you that if you love yourself you will find what you are looking for.

He is not the only one and you can find love if you stop putting your energies into something that is over.

If you decide to talk to your ex on WhatsApp, follow these steps:

1) What will you tell him?

If you still think it’s a good idea to WhatsApp your ex and eventually try to get him back, you need to take some time to think about what you’re going to say.

You should first “feel the ground” before suggesting a meeting.

What kind of way could you choose to talk to him? How could you start?

Since you probably aren’t having contact right now, you might start by asking if he’s okay and how things are.

You could tell him that you have been thinking about him and would like to know how he is doing.

And wait to see how he responds.

Is he friendly and interested in you too?

Only then could you suggest having a cup of coffee together or propose some plan.

2) Do not be pushy

If you send him a message and he doesn’t reply immediately. Don’t pressure him for an answer.

You must respect their times.

He won’t be sure what he wants to tell you. And he probably needs to reflect on everything that you have written to him again implies.

You have already taken the first step, and you must accept whatever he can offer you. Either a message or silence.

3) Don’t play games

In the world of seduction there are many theories.

Some will tell you that it’s okay to play hard to get once you start contact with your ex.

I think there is nothing more wrong than this.

This is a person who knows you and you know very well. Starting games, such as waiting too long to respond if he has written to you, will not lead to anything good.

You have already thought about what you want, simply seek to understand what he feels and accept what he decides.

4) Say no to claims and reproaches

You may want to work things out with your ex. But there is a correct time for everything.

If you get back in touch and they immediately start talking about what went wrong, their differences, or whatever didn’t work out, you probably won’t generate any enthusiasm on their part to see you.

Take things slow. Start by knowing how the other is. What things have changed since you broke up and talk about missing each other.

If things are moving in a good direction, there will be time to talk calmly about what things to change, if they really want to be together.

When is it NOT a good idea to talk to your ex on WhatsApp to get him back?

I have left you here a complete and detailed guide so that you think carefully before writing to your ex on WhatsApp. By now you should be clear on whether this is a good idea or not.

But I leave you one last section with the cases in which it will be preferable that you look for another solution, for your own good and his.

1) He has already rebuilt his life and is happy

I know this can hurt. But if your ex has moved on, he already has a girlfriend, or even the years have passed and he has started a family, perhaps it is best that you do the same.

It is true that where there was fire, ashes remain, there will always be something that unites them.

But maybe he showed up in your life in the past and that was it. He was at the moment that he had to be in your life, and that moment is over.

Now is the time to move towards new bonds and relationships that give you what you need today.

If he has his life redone let him be happy, if you really love him you should wish that for him too.

2) You are submissive in a depression and obsessed with him

Acknowledging this is difficult and requires a lot of courage on your part.

If you are in a constant search for your ex, if you do not realize that this situation is too strong and that it is affecting you.

If you keep thinking about him, if you haven’t realized that you’re suffering because of him.

Maybe you should stop and talk to someone to…