If the door doesn’t open, it’s not your way

If the door does not open, it simply means that it is not the door, much less our path.. However, sometimes we spend too much time and effort looking for keys for which there are not even doors. Because there are impossible destinations, people who do not fit into our locks and paths that are better not to travel.

While is true that None of us guess our personal destinies the first time., it must be said that it is not bad to get lost from time to time either. Opening doors that we then close again to gain experience, to know who is and who is not, is something worth doing without fear but with balance and an appropriate attitude.

Psychologists and sociologists have long wondered what makes people choose a certain path and not another. It is often said that our choices define us, but in reality, Many of those mechanisms that make us go in a certain direction remain unconscious. We invite you to reflect on it.

A closed door is sometimes a wall to break down.

The popular voice has always told us that when one door closes another one opens.. It is also often heard that happiness is like a butterfly, if you chase it it escapes you and if you stay still it comes here. Now, if we paid attention to these principles we would come to the conclusion that happiness and opportunities happen on their own and almost by magic.

When a door closes we usually spend a long time regretting “that slamming door.”. Nobody reacts so quickly as to be able to see that other exit where the best choice, the best path, is supposed to be found. On the other hand, and as an example, it is worth knowing an interesting book titled “The art of choosing” (the art of choice) by psychologist Sheena Iyengar.

Dr. Iyengar is blind. When she came to Canada from India, she knew that her family, as dictated by her culture, was going to decide her marriage when the time came. Added to her blindness was the idea that she was not going to be able to get out of that circle, that personal prison. Thanks to her days at university she was aware that other people’s minds do not have the right to set our own choice scripts. The doors that others close against us are also walls that all of us can break down.

Today Sheena Iyengar is a reference in the psychology of personal choice.

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Starting again when many of our doors have closed

Perhaps, at some point in our life cycle, we did not make the best choice or it may even have been the best choice for a period of time. Enough to make us believe that this was going to be our definitive destination. However, it was not, and After the door slammed, there was emptiness and the rumor of our sadness.. Maybe it was a relationship, maybe a job or a friendship that didn’t end well.

Now that we know that This supposed “emergency door” is not always immediately opened to us, offering us a new exit towards “true happiness.”“, it is worth reflecting on these questions to understand that Life, in reality, is a whole labyrinth of doors through which to travel, cross, enjoy, learn and without a doubt… Also know how to close.

Keys to find the most appropriate path

No path chosen along your experiential journey has been in vain. Far from regretting having crossed a door, having had that partner, having started that project or simply finding more frustrations than joys, It is necessary to assume what has been experienced as good learning. Because every scar teaches, and every wrong path is an invitation to “start again.”.

Understand that when something ends, happiness does not “restart” on its own.. It is necessary to go through a time in which to rebuild ourselves, connect with ourselves again and properly close that door, that stage. There will come a moment when we feel prepared. Far from looking back, we once again feel the invitation to look forward, to get excited again and to walk now with greater security, with greater wisdom. Understand also that There is no “ideal” path, no door holds the key to permanent happiness or the solution to all our problems. It is the journey itself that gives us the answers, and the joys come and go. The only thing we need is to be more receptive, and above all, brave to cross all those wonderful thresholds that we have yet to discover…

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