I dislike everyone: why does it happen?

For most people, social life is a great source of support and gratification. They enjoy spending time with others, meeting new people and socializing. However, there are those for whom It is a negative and disappointing experience.

“I dislike everyone”, “I can’t connect with others”, “they seem cruel, empty and superficial to me”. Do you identify with these statements? So let’s see what could be causing it.

It is important to differentiate between those who harbor these feelings at specific moments (perhaps because they are going through a difficult situation or because they have had a conflict with someone) and those who They have been feeling it practically all their lives..

In the first case, it could be a natural and temporary reaction that does not pose a major problem. However, in the second, it is necessary to investigate the origin and find a solution.

Why do I dislike everyone?

If you feel like you don’t like everyone, you need to remember that there is nothing wrong with you; There is not necessarily anything wrong with the others either. Surely it’s just a matter of making certain adjustments to your perspective and behavior to be able to reverse this situation.

So, these are some of the causes that may be leading you to feel this way:

1. Choice of environment

Frequently, people who feel this rejection towards others are different to some degree. Perhaps they have a special sensitivity, an introverted nature, or unusual hobbies or interests. Thus, it is difficult for them to fit in with the majority of society and identify with its values.

If I love nature, reading and tranquility, and I spend years of my life trying to fit in with extremely extroverted, partying and active people, the most normal thing is that I end up saturated, overwhelmed and worn out. And that, furthermore, I ended up experiencing rejection towards those others who do not understand me and do not allow me to be.

For this reason, it is essential that we learn to be selective with our environments. If I don’t like everyone, maybe I should “change the world”, find my tribe, connect with like-minded people instead of continuing to try to blend in with those who have nothing to do with me.

Others don’t have to change to please me, but I don’t have to give up my essence either: the key is in knowing how to choose who I am going to interact with. In addition, of course, to leave without delay toxic environments in which emotional manipulation or aggression of any kind is present.

2. Rigid thinking, intolerance and demand

Although it is difficult for us to accept it, we must recognize that sometimes we are excessively rigid when it comes to relating to others. Without realizing it, we harbor a series of cognitive biases that invite us to interpret reality in inappropriate ways.

For example, We may have extreme or inflexible ideas about how people should be, how relationships should be. and how events should unfold. Thus, when reality does not conform to these rigid expectations, we feel frustration that we do not know how to handle.

In this aspect, it is very positive to work on tolerance and mental flexibility. We must address these demands and adjust them, stop seeking to be in control and start accepting situations and people as they are. This does not mean that we should relate or sympathize with everyone, but it does help us get rid of that anger and negative judgment that we emit.

When everyone dislikes me, it’s hard for me be understanding, compassionate and empathetic, but it is important that you make this effort. Remember that people who are so demanding and intolerant usually also be so with themselves (even if they don’t realize it), so you are probably also hurting yourself with these ironclad ideas.

3. Social anxiety and fear of rejection

Finally, it is worth considering the possibility that there is an underlying social anxiety that explains this feeling. At first glance, it seems counterintuitive: in reality, social anxiety is characterized by a desire to establish relationships that is overshadowed by a great fear of being judged and rejected by others. However, it is common that, as a defense mechanism, the person ends up feeling rejection towards others in the first place.

Somehow, It’s easier to accept that I don’t like others, that I don’t like how they are. and that I don’t want to have anything to do with them, to assume the possibility that they are the ones who reject me. It is a way in which we convince ourselves not to have to face that fear that paralyzes us.

“It’s not that I’m afraid to interact with others; I avoid doing it because I don’t like them.” Again, The solution is not to establish relationships with everyone, but to accept that this fear exists and that it is important to work on it.. Only in this way can we truly choose our ties freely.

If I don’t like everyone, I can seek help

Feeling this generalized rejection towards all people is hardly going to make us feel good and, in fact, it is very harmful. As social beings, we need to relate to others, receive their support and share life experiences. Thus, this inability to connect can isolate us and lead us to suffer deep feelings of emptiness and loneliness.

It is not necessary for you to change your way of being, your tastes, your values ​​or ideals. You also don’t have to connect with everyone or fit into the mold, but you do need to be able to find your space and build meaningful links.

And, for this, you may need professional support. A therapist can help you dig into the origin of your feelings and take the necessary steps to improve your situation.

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