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Henko, the change without the possibility of return

Henko or へんこう is a Japanese word that refers to a transformative change in which there is no possibility of return to the initial state. On many occasions it represents a very great advance in our personal growth and proof that we are capable of betting on ourselves, reflecting precisely this act of courage. We talk about that turning point that lifts us above fear and worries, transforming our attitude to life.

Beyond what we may think, few words capture concepts as basic, but at the same time so important, as the henko. Having the ability to transform, to evolve, to advance and expand the level of consciousness It is key to overcoming obstacles, dissolving discouragement and emerging stronger from the situations that arise. Henko It is a representation, that of the fruit of resilience.

“In life, it is like this at every key moment, we have to give up a part of who we are to become what we can really be. Change is not free, of course, and it only feeds us if it leads us to transformation.”

-Alex Rovira-

Change to advance

Much of our difficulties would be solved if we introduced a henko, a transformative change in our lives. The problem is that most of the time we are not willing, we do not know how to do it or we are afraid of the new. It is known, for example, that some people prefer to stay in their comfort zone, continued with the same coping strategies, despite not feeling well. In fact, sometimes they make real efforts to prevent a change from occurring that would otherwise occur naturally.

The truth is that the unknown makes us all dizzy, that which we cannot predict, that escapes our calculations and therefore, our control. Hence, when we manage this vertigo poorly, we end up emotionally consumed and exhausted because we choose to hunker down and hold our place instead of embracing change. In this sense, there may be many reasons for transformation, but all of them are ethereal if there is no element at the base: conviction, desire, motivation.

Thus, risk is printed in our heartbeats; On the other hand, we need to tolerate it to a certain degree in order to move forward: to assume that there will be a moment when neither of our feet will touch the ground. Now, let’s not get confused, not every mutation can transform us. Sometimes we change at the same level we are atthat is, we make a first-order change, which is why after a short time we find ourselves immersed in the same dynamics.

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To grow, To start a new path we have to introduce a change at a higher level or second order change, as Paul Watzlawick would say. Now, what does this mean?

Exchange rates according to Paul Watzlawick

Experts in systems theories consider that there are two opposing tendencies when it comes to change. The first of them would have to do with maintaining ourselves in a stable stationary state and the second with producing new forms, both derived from the mathematical theory of logical types.

The Austrian psychologist Paul Watzlawick called these trends change 1 or first order and change 2 or second order, respectively. To explain both, he used the following example: “A person who has a nightmare can do many things within the nightmare: run, hide, scream, etc., but no change in one of these behaviors will end the nightmare.”

Thus, this type of change is called change 1. That is, these are modifications and strategies that have to do with the same dynamics in which the person finds themselves and that are based on negative feedback.

On the other hand, he called type 2 change to that which occurs qualitatively and is based on positive feedback, That is, it increases deviations and gives way to the formation of new structures. If we take into account the previous example, it would be awakening. The only way out of the nightmare would be a change in dreaming, that is, a change in reality, in perspective.

Another example would be found in a frequent case in consultation: parents request psychological help from the lower your child’s academic performance. Surely, they have carried out some actions such as punishing you, reducing extracurricular activities or going out with your friends.

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These would be type 1 changes. The problem is that they do not manage to solve the situation. Now, the therapist, after analyzing and interviewing the different members of the family, observes that both his grandmother and his older sister have come to live at home and this has changed the dynamics of the relationships between all the members. What is type 2 change? The way the family relates would have to be changed. to adapt to this new situation.

Perhaps it is better understood if we think about that person who has begun to feel sad, apathetic, unmotivated and melancholic. In his attempt to improve, he has decided to join the gym, go out more and experiment with creative activities, that is, all type 1 changes. The problem is that, despite all this, she can’t feel good, but rather distracted. What can she do? Introduce a type 2 change: change your perspective, your vision of reality and manage your feelings. This will truly enable you to make transformative change.

“Change is inevitable. Change for the better is a full-time job.”

-Adlai E. Stevenson-

Henko: a change, a new destiny

As we see, change is a phenomenon of several dimensions, especially if we want it to transcend, that is, if we want to cause a change. henko. Thus, it is not enough to just want to change and implement a different action, but before It is necessary to analyze what perspective we have about what happens to us.

We can think that our vision of reality is the correct one and that the world should be built and behave according to our precepts. However, how can we be so sure? Isn’t it true that two people can observe the same event and explain it differently? The truth is that each of us builds and works with our own reality, particular, individual and difficult to exchange. Therefore, Why not investigate other visions to solve what ails us?

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It’s not easy, it’s true. But precisely, because of the complexity it entails, the breath of illusion must be combined with a point of calm. Questioning our vision of the world is not something that is achieved in a short time and in fact, we will not be satisfied until we are in harmony with our ultimate nature, the one that is naked of worries, fears and distortions. So, True well-being is only possible after transcending our ego.

A transformative change, a henkoIt is an exercise in courage in which we face ourselves, our comfort, the schemes that we have been building for years, the ideas that one day made our lives easier.

In this sense, we are the most complicated opponent, but also the one that will provide us with the most lessons and the one that offers us the possibility of empowering ourselves if we do not let ourselves be carried away by their traps and mental games. Finally, although change is a constant in our universe, and being aware of it helps us evolve, the important thing is illuminate the paths that help us grow, using what we have learned and with the encouragement of everything we can discover.

A henko It is the opportunity to be reborn through calm and personal strength.

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