Friendship Day 2023: how to choose and care for friends

On July 30, the international friendship day of this 2023 is celebrated, which serves to pay tribute to friends. To talk about the importance of having good friends, we recovered a phrase about friendship from Benjamin Franklin, one of the most quoted characters in history, who once said that “a brother may not be a friend, but a friend will always be a brother.”

Certainly, our friendships constitute a family of a spiritual order to which we choose to belong regardless of genetic inheritance.

We cannot choose our parents or our siblings We can only try to get along with them. but throughout life we ​​create around us a protective circle of people with whom we share experiences, visions and feelings, who can be as deep or deeper than kinship ties.

Beyond the biological lineage, in our spiritual family there are people who They have acted as father or mother at times when we have needed guidancecompanions who support us as brothers when life gets uphill for us, fragile beings whom we protect as if they were our children…

Why choose friends well

But friendship transcends unconditional love, because it often forces us to turn on the light in those dark regions where the other hides his mistakes.

This always difficult function, which Nietzsche defined as “a hard, campaign bed” in which we should give rest to others, constantly puts friendship to the test, but at the same time it is an opportunity for shared growth.

Throughout a lifetime we can fail on a sentimental level, repeatedly change partners or even choose solitude (the label today is single), but If we have known how to create a spiritual family, love will never be scarce, nor will we run the risk of going astray.

Especially old friends are a living memory of our experiences and evolutions in the theater of existence. They have seen us grow, fail, learn, cry, love.

They are a mirror that shows us where we came from and where we are, and help us discover where we want to go.

As Oscar Wilde remarked, it is not easy to find friends capable of celebrating other people’s successes. There are more who are willing to listen to our misfortunes.

The reason is very simple: when relating to others our self-esteem only it is reinforced when the comparison favors us.

Therefore, for find people of great human quality you have to do a long sieve.

In the same way that we do not throw ourselves into the arms of anyone to form a couple, it is important to choose well the members that we incorporate into our spiritual family, since surrounding oneself with unsuitable travel companions it makes it easier for us to get nowhere.

How to take care of friends

Since the quality of friends determines the quality of life, it is worth asking ourselves which people in our field help us move forward and which ones hold us back.

Know how to distinguish friendships nourishing for the soul toxic, Those that they charge us with negativity and leave us without energy, It is an essential exercise to create an environment that gives us protection and helps us grow.

However, that is not achieved just by choosing the most valuable spiritsBecause they they will not accept to enter our circle unless we are at their level.

Someone selfish and envious cannot expect people with opposite qualities to seek their company.

In other words: we must first cultivate in ourselves those virtues that we hope to find and attract.

It’s not about striving for perfection. neither in us nor in others, but of:

give ourselves without reservations, transmit enthusiasm, express our emotions sincerely, take care of other people’s feelings and know how to listen.

These five keys are enough to build a spiritual family that will always be with us.