Four keys to developing your resilience

Daily life is dotted with difficulties, small and large obstacles, which we must learn to cope with or overcome.. None of us come into this world with a manual for perfect existence, the one that gives us guidelines for every problem, for every crisis and every difficulty. Therefore, it is essential to develop your resilience. Only in this way will you be able to face all the adversities that may surprise you in life.

We come into this world as if fallen from a strange chimney called destiny, luck or providence. We are offered a more or less good family, a more or less democratic society in which to grow up with certain norms and values, and a social circle that we create ourselves as we grow.

Continuous growth

As growing people that we are, it is always worth learning from all those trends that reach us, and that can offer us mechanisms for improvement. And resilience is one of them, it is nothing more nor less than the ability to face problems and adapt as best as possible to those bumps, to those curves in the form of losses, failures, disappointments, traumas and even stressful situations.

We must be clear, being resilient does not at all mean not feeling discomfort, emotional pain or difficulty in the face of adversity. The resilience It is the ability to take on pain, accept it and learn from it. At the same time, we manage both our emotions and our responses, to overcome adversity in the best possible way.

It’s not easy, we know, Learning to be resilient is a long process that requires time and a lot of self-knowledge. But once mastered and understood, we will feel more capable and more protected. Let’s look at the strengths and some keys to developing your resilience.

1. Ability to introspect

The first key to developing your resilience is understanding yourself. To do this, knowing how to listen to yourself, speaking with that inner voice that is connected to that nervous skein of feelings and emotions will be key. To make it,stop and simply pay attention to that inner rumor that shapes you as a vulnerable and also strong person. Able.

It is the ideal time to practice mindfulness or mindfluness. This technique will allow you to pay attention to your thoughts. A fundamental aspect is not to judge any thought that crosses your mind. We just have to observe them and let them go away like clouds in the sky. In this way, little by little, we will investigate inside ourselves and get to know the demons that torment us. Thus, as we get to know ourselves we will be able to face situations in a much calmer and deeper way.

2. Essential motivation

Adversity can embrace you with its cold and terrible mantle. He will want to take the wind out of you and plunge you into a solitary corner. But you must not let yourself be defeated. There are many other things beyond pain, loss or frustration. Your project, your need to move forward, to get excited again about life and your loved ones. We must all have an existential plan, a goal on the horizon for which to continue smiling every morning.

From Buddhist psychology they defend that adversity should serve as an impetus to learn. You can learn from both the good and the bad. Therefore, if instead of observing problems as an obstacle in our life we ​​see them as a possibility for personal development, without a doubt, we will be choosing an option that will enrich us significantly.

3. Emotional self-regulation

It’s okay to feel anger, grief, heartbreak, sadness… it’s essential to cry and vent. But once we have passed this stage, it is time to get up and regulate these emotions, rationalizing them first towards acceptance and then overcoming them..

Know your emotions, accept them and guide them towards an optimal and healing process that can strengthen you. Knowing how you feel at every moment is the first step to knowing yourself deeply. This way you will be able to develop your resilience.

4. Positive attitude and self-confidence

It’s not just a label. It is not that phrase that sells so much and that you so often find on the walls of your social networks: Maintaining a positive attitude towards life is a necessity. We know that sometimes it is not easy, that darkness devastates us without anyone expecting it, without anyone having prepared for it and that it may be impossible to show a smile in such circumstances.

But rest assured that there is no dawn that has not been able to defeat the dusk, and What seems so black to you today will gradually lose that intensity if you face it with strength and optimism.. And above all, with confidence in yourself.

We all have resources to be able to face adversity. Search within yourself, make an effort, love yourself and convince yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you are going to achieve it. This hides the key to developing your resilience.

And you… are you a resilient person?

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