Feeling neglected in a relationship: when love is cold

Sometimes love feels cold. It is a sharp and strange sensation, it is almost like walking naked, like feeling that something is missing and that I know something, in reality, it is everything. Feeling neglected in an emotional relationship hurts and makes us alarm. It is easy to think that the partner is losing interest and that, little by little, we are ceasing to be a priority and being someone to simply take for granted.

Whoever has gone through an experience of this type knows the sensations. Also understand what type of thoughts are floating around in the mind and what form the fears have that assault and grip our daily lives.

Because, Beyond what we can think, loving is caring and when that interest is not perceived where there is attentionselfless affection and a love that is felt and comforting, it is logical that doubts and the prick of fear arise.

Thus, something that sociologists, anthropologists and psychologists have been pointing out is that these types of fears are the result of a change in expectations in this matter.

It is said that now we are much more demanding. That we want a best friend by our side, a lover, a soul mate, that life partner who enriches us emotionally and intellectually… We want each other free and, at the same time, united in every fiber, coinciding in every thought and desire. It may be so, Our expectations may become increasingly higher and more refined.

However, This does not mean that we all deserve the attention that comes from caring. Because those who love do not neglect and, if this happens, we must understand what may be happening.

Feeling neglected in a relationship: why does it happen?

There are few colds more uncomfortable than that of emotional negligence. The fact of feeling neglected in a relationship can be perfectly due to this dimension, perceiving that we no longer have the loved person as our support. Negligent couples are those who no longer provide understanding, who are present but absent and who, furthermore, are incapable of nurturing the other in affection and communication.

They have gone from being accomplices to becoming strange bed and sofa companions.. Now, in addition to this emotional abandonment, there are other dimensions that can explain this neglect. That feeling of absence, cold and emotional neglect. Let’s analyze it below.

A deadly sin: when love is taken for granted

Sometimes we do it. People are comfortable and very often tend to be sedentary. And we’re not just referring to the simple lack of exercise, spending more hours watching television series than wearing out the soles of your sneakers doing sports. In emotional matters there are also lazy and sedentary emotional people.
They are those people who take for granted that whoever loves them today will always do so. They are the ones who confuse stability with laziness, commitment with blind devotion. And that formula doesn’t work because they forget something essential: love is worked on daily, in every detail, in every word and in every behavior.

Feeling neglected in a relationship can therefore be due to this type of neglect. Love can continue to exist, but if it is not attended to, if it is not polished daily, that flame fades.

Personal problems and possible psychological disorders

There is an obvious fact that we cannot leave aside: psychological health. It may surprise us, but there are many people who barely get through their lives without knowing that they suffer from anxiety, that stress is changing their personality or that the discomfort that grips them daily is depression.

These types of psychological realities have a direct impact on a relationship. It is very difficult to care for and love your partner as they deserve if you have stopped loving yourself. if you no longer connect with yourself.

When someone loses motivation and no longer sees meaning in many of the things they do, it is almost impossible to be a good friend, a good lover, a soul mate. In these situations, it is essential to detect what is happening, support and accompany the couple in seeking professional help.

When we need more than our partner can, wants or knows how to give us

Feeling neglected in a relationship has other types of explanatory factors. We talk, for example, about those situations in which one needs more than what is permissible, than what is logical and expected in a relationship.

Sometimes, there are those who have low self-esteem and a high degree of dependency. In these cases, what is needed from the other is “everything”, thus creating very suffocating bonds.

On the other hand, another type of reality can also happen. We feel neglected because those who share life with us do not know how to respond to us.. Factors such as alexithymia, emotional immaturity or simply that incompetence where not understanding what it means to be a couple, can be another explanatory element.

Finallywe cannot rule out an obvious fact either: there are those who love in their own way. In a way that is insufficient or harmful to us. They are those situations where they position themselves in their attitudes and do not give in, do not change and never will. All of this generates, as we can imagine, great pain.

Heartbreak and feeling neglected in a relationship

Feeling neglected in a relationship can sometimes be the prelude to heartbreak itself.. That coldness that we talked about at the beginning is the obvious sign that there is something that is happening, something that is frictional, that does not fit and that is scary. The most appropriate thing in this type of circumstance is to talk about it. Communication is key.

We must express to the couple what we feel and ask what may be happening. Taking measures, trying to resolve, generating changes between the two can give a good boost to the relationship and get it afloat again.

Other times, as we well know, there is no choice but to let go. Prolonging what hurts and what no longer has a solution is a form of useless suffering that should be avoided.

To conclude, let’s always try to maintain fluid communication. Emotional dialogue, empathy and understanding must be our best allies in all cases.

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