Experts share the secrets to finding the ideal partner — and charisma is nowhere near number one.

In the modern world, finding a partner has become both easier and more difficult at the same time. On the one hand, there are many dating sites and apps, but for some reason, things rarely end up in marriage. Modern matchmakers know why this happens, and now, in this post, we are going to share the effective ways that can lead you to build lasting and strong relationships.

But the awesome.club warns that everything is subjective and we shouldn’t expect miracles. Anyway, these are just some advice, and it all depends on us. But we hope that our publication will help you build your happiness as soon as possible.

If you have a high expectation of the qualities that are desirable in your potential future partner, but you don’t deliver even half of what is “requested,” then we have bad news. Don’t wait for a miracle or for the prince or princess to fall in love, despite all their flaws. First, you need to evaluate yourself and understand that your future partner will also do the same. Work on yourself, trying to become the type of person you want to attract.

Here everything is quite clear. If the couple has different priorities from the beginning, it is unlikely that a lasting relationship will be built. But don’t expect the other to tell you all their values ​​and life goals right away. Observe how he behaves with people close to him, if he gives importance to his family or if he is still “looking for adventure”. The result of this type of observation will be much more valuable than your potential partner’s words.

If you’ve been waiting all your life for a blue-eyed blonde or a green-eyed seductress, it doesn’t mean that men or women with other characteristics can’t establish a solid relationship with you. Appearance is important for certain types of encounters, but if your goal is to start a family, it will be better to pay attention to the qualities that your partner will retain throughout life (appearance, fortunately and unfortunately, changes).

An analogy with friends is a good example. Look closely at your best friends: most likely, their appearance is not perfect, but they have the qualities that you value. The same goes for relationships: be more flexible in choosing a partner and evaluate, first of all, the inner world, no matter how cliché this phrase may sound.

If the potential partner’s behavior causes you negative emotions, do not tolerate it. It’s better to cut off a clearly toxic relationship from the start than not knowing how to get out of it. Determine for yourself the things that are strictly unacceptable for your values ​​(be it alcohol, cruelty, attitude towards religion, politics and family or whatever) and never compromise, no matter how much you want a relationship. And if you start to think “better with him (with her) than alone (alone)”, it is a clear sign of low self-esteem, so we advise you to pay special attention to this topic.

If you want a strong and harmonious family, no matter how terrible it sounds, choose someone with a similar intellectual level. Of course, it is possible to build an unequal relationship, but it may look more like a union of father (mother) and child, in which one of the members of the couple will “educate” the other, and sooner or later someone will get tired. And that’s something none of us want to happen at all.

The language of love is a person’s way of giving love to their partner. Family counselor Gary Chapman distinguishes 5 ways of affirmation: quality time, gifts, acts of service, words of affirmation, and physical touch. It’s good when your way of understanding love coincides, but if it doesn’t, problems can start. For example, for you the best expression of love is to be quiet in your corner, but your partner, on the other hand, won’t stop talking, hugging, etc. If you do not learn in time exactly what expressions of love are valuable to him (her), then in the future this can lead to a break in relations. But it is better to understand in advance what you will have to do and whether you really want to work on yourself all the time.

Don’t ignore your intuition when it sends you signals that something is wrong. For example, before meeting your partner, you feel bad all the time or start being late for dates, for reasons that, apparently, are beyond your control. And if, on the contrary, when he or she is close, time seems to fly by, that’s a good sign. However, if everything seems to be going well, but you don’t feel inspired, it’s best not to start this relationship. Listen to yourself, because you are the one who will presumably be living with this person your whole life, not your friends or your parents.

We really hope that our post will help you to meet “the” woman or “the” right man. Maybe you also have something to share with us… For example, tell us how you built a solid and enjoyable relationship with your partner.