Emotional catharsis: when repressed emotions overflow

When emotions block us and saturate us, we try to exert self-control. They have taught us that it is not okay to cry, nor to be seen badly. And that is why we try to present ourselves to others as whole, happy, strong, even though inside we are about to explode and we feel vulnerable, weak, excited…

We try to hide what we feel, repress it, live as if I don’t feel the way I feel, that is, denying myself.

“An emotion does not cause pain. Resistance or suppression of an emotion causes pain.”

-Fredrick Dodson-

When everything explodes

And so the day comes, of emotional catharsis, that day when I can’t take it anymore, I feel tired, exhausted, wanting to give up everything, and then I get overwhelmed, my emotions are unleashed, I can’t control them, they surface without permission, and I feel very bad…

At the same time, my body responds physically in pain, with illness, showing physical reactions, discomfort… That is emotional catharsis, when I suffer an emotional breakdown, my emotions block me, paralyze me.I can no longer be strong and contain them, I feel defeated, small, as if the world were a dangerous place for me, everything harms me, and causes me pain, no one understands me…

It is precisely this cathartic moment that I have wanted to avoid for a long time., during which I have shown myself to be strong, impassive, brave and that is why I had achieved the “self-control”, so necessary to feel balanced. However, over time every container ends up filling up, and it had to happen.

“You have control over your emotions, don’t lose it. It is not about not showing your annoyance, but about doing it in moderation, without later regretting an action committed in a moment of lack of control.”

-Napoleon Hill-

How to achieve emotional catharsis

If we analyze and observe the “emotional explosion”, we will realize that it has not arisen from nowhere, But for an unpredictable time, I have been “holding it in” and not allowing my deepest feelings, some of them unconscious, to surface. Therefore, we could say that if he denied them, if he did not allow them to leave, in reality, he did not accept them.

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And if we continue diving, perhaps we discover thoughts of “self-demand”, such as, “I have to be well.” Therefore, he restored me, hid my deepest emotions and “thanks to that”, I could continue living with the “false” feeling of control and balance.

“If it is not in your power to change a situation that causes you pain, you can always choose the attitude with which you face that suffering.”

– Viktor Frankl

Avoid emotional catharsis

This cathartic explosion is necessary for “emotional health” if we reach this level of emotional denial. However, always It’s healthier not to get here.

For it, From the first emotion or feeling, I will allow myself to live it in all its expressionaccepting that “I am human and I have emotions”, valuing these as part of a learning process, growth, change and maturation.

Hence, it is necessary to find healthy ways of expressing emotions, which are not harmful to the person themselves or to others. It is necessary to get those emotions out, express them, shout them, tell them, cry them…And free yourself from them. All repression is negative, it makes the emotions grow inside us with more intensity and pain. Well, they are unresolved.

All “controlled” expression is therapeutic, liberating. And this means accepting emotions, talking about them and not hiding them. We call this emotional intelligence.

To do this, it is essential to lose the fear of suffering, of feeling vulnerable in front of others.since the greatest pain is the one that is not expressed, and the greatest vulnerability is the pressure to hide and not be yourself.

“The emotionally intelligent person has skills in four areas: identifying emotions, using emotions, understanding emotions, and regulating emotions.

–John Mayer –