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Differences between resentment and resentment

Have you ever suffered the effect of these two emotions? Know their differences, what each one consists of and, above all, what we can do so that they do not become a burden.

Are rancor and resentment the same thing? When we hear these words, we tend to immediately think about the harm that other people have caused us and the reaction that that harm has produced in us. However, Although they may seem similar concepts, they are not exactly the same.: in this article we will know the differences between resentment and resentment.

To delve a little deeper into the topic, let’s say that we feel resentment when someone does something that we don’t like, harms us, or offends us. However, resentment goes beyond resentment; It usually hides a desire for revenge, and it is a more intense and destructive feeling. How else are they different? How can we free ourselves from these feelings? We reveal it all, here!

What are rancor and resentment?

Before delving into the differences between resentment and resentment, let’s know, broadly speaking, what each concept means. The RAE (Royal Spanish Academy) defines resentment as a ‘deep-rooted and tenacious resentment’. On the other hand, resentment would be ‘the action and effect of being resentful’ and resentment means ‘having a feeling, regret or anger about something’.

Resentment refers to a feeling of hostility or great resentment towards someone, due to an offense or damage received. In the case of resentment, we are talking about a persistent feeling of disgust or anger towards someone because we consider them the cause of a certain offense or damage suffered. That is to say, The causes of both feelings could be the samealthough the concepts differ slightly from each other.

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Differences between resentment and resentment

As we see, these are slightly different concepts. Without further ado, let’s know the differences between resentment and resentment:

Degree of intensity: Resentment is a much more intense feeling than resentment.Duration: Resentment is a more lasting state than resentment, the latter being somewhat more punctual over time.Depth: Another difference between resentment and resentment is its degree of depth; Resentment is something much deeper than resentment.Causes: Although the causes may be similar, resentment is normally unleashed by more serious situations than those that cause resentment.Consequences: Prolonged resentment can have much more harmful consequences for our physical and mental health than resentment, in addition to producing greater interference in our lives.

Let’s give some examples

To better illustrate the differences between grudge and resentment, let’s think about some examples. Let’s imagine that a person has killed someone very dear to us (a very serious situation), resentment towards that person appears. This feeling is intense and deep and if it is not addressed or managed, it usually lasts very long over time.

In the case of resentment, let’s imagine that a friend of ours does not invite us to his birthday party or wedding. As a result of this situation, we could develop resentment towards that person. That is, we would be resentful of “X” person. As we see, the situation is not as serious as in the previous case, although it may still be annoying or harmful. In this case, furthermore, Resentment is usually less intense than resentment and less lasting over time.

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It’s hard to stay mad at someone all your life because they didn’t invite us to a party, right? On the other hand, we can hate a person who killed a loved one all our lives, and that is what resentment is about.

How to overcome these feelings?

Although each case must be analyzed and addressed in a personalized way, and taking into account that feeling resentment is not the same as feeling resentment, we leave you some general guidelines to address these very negative feelings. Although there are no “positive or negative” emotions, because they all have their functiongetting away from these types of feelings can bring us a good dose of well-being and liberation.

The first thing we must be clear about is that identifying emotions allows us to start working to understand them. How I feel? And because? That is, detecting resentment and resentment (how it manifests itself in our body, in our mind, in our way of relating…) and analyzing its cause can help us free ourselves from them in the future.

Once the feeling and its cause are detected, We can try to find a way to express what we feel. We can talk about it with the person who caused us harm, introduce it into our internal dialogue in a restorative way or write it in a letter, for example.

Work on forgiveness

Any of the strategies mentioned can bring us closer to the forgiveness, or what is the same, to the release of rancor or resentment. Forgiving is often the end of a job in which the final step is acceptance. With forgiveness we free ourselves from the negative feelings associated with what caused us so much suffering; is, in a way, a way to make peace with the past, with others and with ourselves.

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However, forgiving (whether for oneself or another) is an act that is as liberating as it is difficult to carry out. Therefore, many times A good option will be to go to psychological therapyto be able to manage all these past emotions and conflicts.

“Forgiveness is a silent gift that we leave on the doorstep of those who have wronged us.”

-Robert Enright-

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Abel, O. (1992). Forgiveness: breaking debt and forgetting. Madrid: Cátedra.Caballo (2002). Manual for the cognitive-behavioral treatment of psychological disorders. Vol. 1 and 2. Madrid. 21st century (Chapters 1-8, 16-18). ROYAL SPANISH ACADEMY: Dictionary of the Spanish language, 23rd ed., .

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