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Cultivate patience

The word patience derives directly from a more universal term: peace. In fact, if it is broken down, we could say that it is the “science of peace.” Over time, there has been some alteration of the word’s original meaning.

Many think that patience is that questionable virtue that leads some to endure any adversity., without hardly saying anything. But that interpretation is inaccurate. This is a perspective that assumes patience as a passive virtue, when in reality it is an attribute that requires putting many of our emotional resources into action.

Although patience involves maintaining serenity during bad times or in the face of offenses, this does not mean that it is a matter of “stay still” and “hold out” until you can.

Impulsivity and patience

Inside each of us there continues to live a mammal, more or less predatory. When character is not cultivated, we tend to be impulsive. We react quickly to attack or defend ourselves, without being clear about what we intend to achieve, or the strategy we are going to use to achieve it. Sometimes, we cannot even define exactly what the threat is that produces such reactions in us.

Patience is the opposite extreme of impulsiveness. It is not a state of passivity, but rather a response based on wisdom and not on what our guts scream at us.

The kind of peace that leads to patience is, above all, an inner peace. It supposes a degree of balance sufficient to restrain primary impulses and replace them with a slow process of analysis. This inner peace will require great inner cultivation of an understanding, empathetic and patient mind. A mind that, despite what happens out there, knows how to remain calm.

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While patience leads us to be assertive (say what we wanted to say, do what we wanted to do and think what we wanted to think), impulsivity leads us to mistakes. We end up aggravating problems that were not serious, creating distances where there should be closeness and saying what our impulse to cause harm tells us, instead of what can do good for everyone.

That’s why patience is among the great universal virtueswhich even the most daring warriors have cultivated throughout history.

Cultivate patience

No one is born wielding the virtue of patience

To make it, In principle, it is about giving up reacting immediately. Sometimes a few seconds make the difference between acting erratically or behaving intelligently. As sage Shantideva states: “So, when I see a friend or enemy doing something wrong, I will remember that it happens due to circumstances and I will remain calm.”. Shantideva, introduces us in this way, that understanding the circumstances of a situation will lead us to foster our patience.

It is a training. The more you practice, the more patient you will be. The more you get into the habit of taking a moment before responding or acting, the more easily you will insert that command into your brain, forcing it to reason.

Breathing helps you calm down. Breathing deeply is always an easy resource, which we have at hand all the time. But also It helps that, while cultivating patience, you plant in your mind and heart the idea that you are master of yourself. That everything you do or fail to do is exclusively your responsibility. That everything that happens will depend on the way you act.

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Final reflection

With that conviction and a pinch of hope, you can achieve it. Think that everything in life has a beginning and an end. Just as moments of happiness are born and die, adversities, or unpleasant moments, are not eternal. Patience helps you make any problem more manageablelasts less and has more controllable consequences.

So, if we begin to shift the focus on controlling emotions, we will begin to be masters of our patience. Instead of giving others the power to get on our nerves, we will be the ones who decide to be calm or upset. In this way, when we are aware that we have the power to remain calm despite what is happening out there, we will have taken a very important step. A step that will lead us to enjoy a much calmer and more peaceful life.

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