Complacency: how does it prevent us from progressing?

In a world that urges us to always be more, to always be the best, to constantly improve ourselves, Being at peace with who we are, regardless of our aspirations, builds one of the strongest pillars of our well-being. However, this pillar is not immune to the attack of certain erosive agents, such as extreme conformism or systematic acceptance. This level of complacency can hold us back and stagnate us in unhappiness; Therefore, today we want to talk to you more about it.

First of all, you are under no obligation to improve in any area or make any changes you do not want. Personal development is, precisely, personal. Just because your partner likes sports or working on his or her body doesn’t mean you should do it too; Just because a friend is very restrictive with his diet does not mean that you should imitate him.

Each person is different and is more motivated or inclined to work on certain areas. Not all of them have to be yours, and it will not always be your time to work on all of them. However, if there is some aspect of your life that causes you discomfort, that you really would like to improve, complacency can prevent you from achieving it. And this is when it is time to do something about it.

In its positive sense, self-indulgence helps us be better with ourselves.

What is complacency?

Complacency is defined as the feeling of satisfaction with one’s own way of being or acting. In this way, we are satisfied with who we are and what we do; We feel that we are already what we should be and that we already do what we should do. It’s about acceptance and the ability to be at peace with one’s own reality.

Thus, complacency has a positive and luminous aspect. And it is that It allows us to be okay with what happens and that we cannot change. It is evident that there is part of our life that is not in our hands to modify and fighting against it only generates wear and tear. In this way, being pleased with my height or my innate temperament (unchangeable aspects) can save me a lot of suffering.

Complacency too It is useful for those people who tend to be very self-demanding and rigid. Those who feel that they must always do more, that they are never enough, that they need to improve and never stop to be valid. In these cases, learning to appreciate one’s own value, recognize merits and accept the now is very healthy.

Now, when we indulge in excessive self-indulgence, we harm ourselves in several ways.

Complacency: an obstacle to progress

The dark side of complacency is what leads us to ignore our responsibility. That responsibility we have with ourselves, to take care of ourselves, develop ourselves and take charge of our lives.

Mainly, there are three ways in which this attitude affects us:

Accusation and victimhood

If we feel pleased with who we are and what we do, but we are still dissatisfied with our life, we have no choice but to blame an external agent. This is how we place the responsibility on our parents, our bosses, our friends or partner. We convince ourselves that they are the cause of our frustration and unhappiness.because they don’t behave as they should.

In this self-deception, the person feels that they have already done everything they can and should do, and that if something goes wrong it is no longer their business. But This lack of self-criticism is what prevents you from obtaining improvement; Finally, each person is responsible for his or her own life. Nobody will do it for you.

Lack of self confidence

Complacency too leads us to be excessively indulgent with ourselves and forgive us multiple transgressions. For example, if I set a goal to start exercising on Monday, but Thursday has arrived and I haven’t started yet, I’m setting a horrible precedent: I can’t trust myself because I don’t follow through.

Complacency hides behind comfort and short-term reinforcement; At that moment when I don’t feel like training I convince myself that nothing is happening, that I already lead a healthy enough life or that I deserve to rest. However, when this attitude is repeated day after day, it is impeding my progress; a progress that I set for myself and I wish to achieve and with which I am not committing.

Deterioration of self-esteem

Lastly, self-esteem is also affected by this trend. Overly self-indulgent people tend to praise themselves and brag about every small achievement, while overlooking areas for improvement. This is what happens with parents who reward and praise their children excessively: His words are empty.

Actually, self-esteem is built based on facts, to the challenges we overcome, to the goals we set and achieve, to the successes we really achieve. When you settle too much, make excuses and deceive yourself, this affects the image you have of yourself and it is possible that you will increasingly feel less capable and more unmotivated.

On the negative side, complacency prevents us from moving forward and in a way leads us to self-deception.

Be intelligently self-indulgent

In short, we cannot say that complacency has a negative nature, or in all cases negative. In fact, to some degree (and especially for some people) it is positive and beneficial. However, It is important to find a balance along with self-criticism and self-demand.

If we are too conformist, permissive and self-indulgent, we run the risk of becoming trapped in unsatisfactory realities. Remember: accept what you cannot change, but work on what you can and want to change.

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