Cellopathy, when jealousy reaches a dangerous extreme

We can all feel jealous in certain circumstances in our lives. It is a natural, human reaction to the threat of loss of a relationship that we consider valuable. However, sometimes, the intensity and irrationality of this jealousy make it a real problem. Cellopathy seriously affects the lives of all people involved.

Pathological jealousy usually comes from one’s own personal insecurity and the need to control the other.. When the discomfort they produce is so high and uncontrolled that it leads us to commit acts of violence or coercion, we need to ask for help.

What is cellopathy?

A certain degree of jealousy can be considered normal within a healthy and mature relationship. In this case, the perception of competition or the threat of loss of the partner would trigger an understandable and proportionate reaction. The individual would be able to assertively talk to his or her partner about the situation and reach a resolution.

In the case of cellopathy we are talking about a fixed and invariable conviction of being deceived by the other. Even though there is abundant evidence to the contrary, the person continues to be distrustful, irritable and aggressive. And she begins an escalation of surveillance, control and persecution in order to catch her partner being unfaithful.

Pathological jealousy is a complex phenomenon that manifests itself at all levels of the person. On an emotional level you feel great discomfort, anxiety and insecurity. Cognitively, intrusive thoughts occur, with a degree of conviction, about the other’s infidelity. Finally At a behavioral level, a series of compulsive rituals are unleashed whose objective is to continually reassure the loyalty of the other.

In the most serious cases, the jealous person can initiate aggressive and hostile behaviors. towards his partner and the supposed third person. Likewise, he may resort to harming himself to try to manage his partner through feelings of guilt.

Obsessive jealousy and cellopathy: are they the same?

It is pertinent to keep in mind that obsessive jealousy does not refer to the same phenomenon as pathological jealousy, since they differ in:

First of all, Obsessive jealousy refers to a non-delusional obsession about infidelity. of the couple. In this case, the person is constantly thinking that their partner is unfaithful or may be unfaithful at any time, which can generate a lot of anxiety. For its part, in cellopathy, there is delirium. That is, the person has unfounded and deep-rooted beliefs about their partner’s infidelity. This is a more serious case because the individual develops absolute certainty of what he believes. and it is impossible to convince him that his belief is false. In fact, they can be presented with irrefutable evidence that denies his ideas, but all of this will be interpreted in the opposite way, thus reinforcing his delusional belief system.

Symptoms of cellopathy

Some typical manifestations of pathological jealousy are:

Excessive control over the partner’s activities and behaviors, to the point of suffocating his partner. There have even been cases where they chase or use a camera to spy on the other. Significant discomfort when you are not with your partner, since you cannot control them.Constant anger for any reasonFor example, not answering their calls instantly. Misinterpretations of any behavior of the couple. For example, if the couple cuts their hair or buys new clothes, they will believe that it is to attract their lover, since they assume that they already have one. Intense emotions that are difficult to manage, such as aggression, anger and frustration.Low self-esteem and insecurity.

What is the origin of pathological jealousy?

There is a possibility that cellopathy has an organic basis and is caused by conditions such as dementia, alcoholism, or the use of certain drugs and medications. However, Most cases have a psychological origin associated with low self-esteem, self-doubt or emotional dependence.

Likewise, cellopathy is usually associated with psychological disorders such as schizophrenia, delusional disorder or obsessive-compulsive disorder.

Thus, Jealousy, far from being an expression of love, is a reflection of one’s own insecurity and failure in emotional management.. Even if there were consummated infidelity, it would be possible to distinguish a healthy individual from another jealous individual by the disproportionate reaction of the individual. In large part, jealousy is more about protecting one’s own honor than about loving the other.

Therefore, it is common for people with difficulties managing their emotions and internal states to unleash a repertoire of control behaviors. Thoughts related to infidelity are permanent, as are excessive demands on the partner.

The jealous person does not respect the personal space of others and acts out of anxiety and hostility. All of this causes a huge deterioration in their emotional ties and a huge interference in both their lives.

Maintaining this attitude within the relationship can motivate the couple to seek refuge in another personthus producing the opposite effect that the jealous person is looking for.

Consequences of jealousy in the couple

If jealousy is the order of the day in a relationship and manifests itself with great intensity, the bond will gradually be damaged; The most common effects being:

General discomfort in both, where they tend to experience a lot of frustration, stress, anxiety and sadness, which affect beyond the relationship.Constant fights and conflicts, where threats and persecution are very present. This behavior tends to push the partner away and cause them to seek comfort in another person. Achieving the opposite effect to what the jealous person would want. When the couple can’t take it anymore, The breakup is usually a fairly common way out. At this point, both have already gone through a destructive and harmful process for each other’s health.Weakening of the self-esteem of both.

Can cellopathy be treated?

When this problem exists, it is necessary to turn to specialized professionals who can offer us the necessary help. Sometimes certain types of drugs are indicated, but When cellopathy does not have an organic origin, exposure with response prevention is the most effective alternative.

In this case It is about building together with the person a hierarchy of the situations that trigger their jealousy and then gradually beginning to expose themselves to them.. This exhibition is carried out both in imagination and in real life, with the aim of getting the person used to them and they stop causing anxiety.

In addition, response prevention is used in order to stop reinforcing that jealousy with controlling behaviors. Once the person is exposed to the situation, they are prevented from carrying out any compulsive reinsurance behavior. In this way, it is possible to manage the emotional intensity that the person experiences and eliminate inappropriate behaviors and reactions from them. Finally, it may be useful in some cases to accompany treatment with cognitive restructuring.

What to do if you suffer from pathological jealousy?

If you feel that your jealousy is uncontrollable and that it is significantly affecting the relationship, It is best to go to a professional. Let us remember that behind this phenomenon there are serious problems that require attention by a specialist.

For its part, If you are aware that your jealousy is disproportionate and is causing a lot of discomfort in both of you, we advise you the next:

Avoid unfounded interpretations

The jealous person tends to interpret reality in the worst possible way. For example, if the partner does not answer your calls, they will think that you are with her lover, that you do not want to talk to him or her, that you no longer love him or her, among others.

However, behind that event there may be other contexts happening that do not correspond to your thoughts. Well, the couple may be busy with other matters, driving or in an important work meeting, for example.

Identify ruminative thoughts and avoid them

Beliefs about your partner’s infidelity can be uncontrollable and cause a lot of discomfort. So every time you catch yourself thinking about it, Reframe the situation and nip the thought in the bud.

For example, if you kept thinking that he wasn’t answering his phone because he was with his lover, Be aware that you may be misunderstanding the facts and focus on something else.

Work on trust towards your partner

It is important that you learn to trust your partner and know that he is with you because he loves you.. If you are not able to take this position, what is the point of continuing to maintain the relationship? Or put another way, if you are sure that your partner is cheating on you, why continue there?

Strengthen your self-esteem

The root of jealousy is usually personal insecuritiesand behind the insecurities the following belief is usually hidden: “I’m not good enough and that’s why my partner can leave me for someone better than me.”

Therefore, It is important that we learn to cultivate self-love; Without this, couples can become very dependent on each other.

In conclusion, We highlight the importance of going to a professional to address pathological jealousy.Let us remember that we are facing a situation that usually causes a lot of damage and discomfort in those involved.

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