Being emotionally independent: keys to achieving it

If we were given the choice, we would all want to be happy and enjoy positive moods. We would like to feel happy, fulfilled and at peace. However, we do not always succeed: sadness, anger, irritation or worry invade us during the day without being able to avoid it. If this happens to you, you may need to learn to be emotionally independent.

Generally, we associate emotional dependence with relationships and the way in which someone prioritizes the needs of another person. However, this concept goes further. Being emotionally independent means becoming your own center, taking responsibility for what you feel. and not give this power to other people.

In this respect, it not only means knowing how to be alone, but also knowing how to love without losing one’s own essence. It not only concerns relationships but also all those bonds you maintain. In short, it implies not allowing your mood or emotional state to depend on what others do, think or feel.

Keys to being emotionally independent

If you want to achieve this degree of freedom, we propose some keys that will help you achieve it.

1. Stay in touch

Being emotionally independent is a job that requires discipline; Perhaps since we were children we have become accustomed to letting ourselves go. How many days do you take a few minutes to sit with yourself and ask yourself how you feel, what you need, how you are?

Normally, we do not maintain this internal dialogue in a context of harmony, we let life happen to us in the hope that everything will go well and that others will take care of making us happy or reducing our discomfort. But this is our task.

Adopt the habit of to be in constant contact with you, to listen to you, to detect your emotions as soon as they appear. At that moment, name them and try to understand them. Where did they come from? What can you do to feel better?

2. Take charge of your well-being

Often, emotional dependence arises when we place the responsibility of making us happy on others. For this reason, it is essential that let’s build for ourselves a life worth living.

Create for yourself a day to day that excites you, that motivates you, that empowers you and help you continue growing. Be happy and fulfilled for yourself first, so that you can share your well-being with whoever is in your life and can continue to maintain it if that person is not there.

3. Dare to be authentic

Emotional dependence is closely related to the fear of rejection and abandonment and the need to please. If you want to be emotionally independent you have to have the courage to be yourself, even at the risk of receiving criticism or claims.

Your well-being cannot depend on keeping others happy.; Therefore, do not choose your career based on what your family dictates, do not abandon your hobbies and your friendships for your partner or change your physical appearance or your personality to fit into a group. Always be true to yourself, your greatest commitment is to yourself.

4. Learn to tolerate other people’s negative emotions

This is a key point to achieve emotional independence: learn to distinguish between what others feel and what you feel. It’s hard to be okay if someone close to you is upset, angry, or disappointed by something we did or said; however, Their emotions are not ours and we have the right not to share them..

Often, in order to keep others happy, we give in to requests that do not convince us, we ask for forgiveness without having made a mistake, or we spend sleepless nights due to worry. Remember that your responsibility is to you: If you know that you have acted well, it is the other’s job to manage their own emotions. It’s okay if the other person gets angry.

5. Release when necessary

Finally, Try not to cling to people or situations that no longer contribute to your well-beingr. It is never pleasant to let go of those we have loved, those who have shared a great friendship, it is difficult to face changes and we can feel great vertigo; However, it is not positive to sustain the unsustainable.

Trust in yourself and your abilities, remember that you are fully capable of moving forward and don’t be afraid to close the cycle. If you have you, this is the only thing that matters.

Emotional independence is based on authenticity, connection with oneself and the ability to let go.

Being emotionally independent does not mean isolating yourself

emotional independence provides a great feeling of freedom, peace and authenticity. When it is achieved, we are able to relate to others in a healthy way, learn to properly manage our own emotions and reduce the frequency in which we experience moments of conflict, sadness or discomfort.

However, it is important to take care of ourselves, so as not to fall into the other extreme. Let us remember that we are social beings, that we need others and that human bonds protect our physical and mental health.

Be emotionally independent It does not mean isolating yourself, becoming selfish or lacking empathy.. On the contrary, it means taking care of ourselves to be able to offer a more complete, healthy and fulfilling version of our relationships.

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