Amigovios: friends with benefits

The term boyfriends refers to that emotional relationship where two people say they are friends, but sometimes have sexual relations without any commitment.

Do you know what a friend is? History shows us significant changes in what people consider important to build or establish a relationship. Years ago, the security of the marriage institution was sought above all. Getting married was a destiny that was seen as the only legitimate space that allowed social acceptance and a valid environment for children.

Later, romance and freedom occupied a place of importance for young couples. Having a courtship opened the doors to begin independence from the family and to live the romantic scenes that the cinema of the second half of the 20th century recreated.

What is happening today? What many people ask of their partner is not just the feeling. Satisfying, unique and intense sensations are also requested.. Many young people and adults tend to value, above all, their freedom to get closer and discover the pleasure of caresses, kisses and the entire range of sexual behaviors.

The friends

Friends could be defined as a couple who know each other, who maintain a certain complicity and in which there is an attraction. However, in it There is no more commitment than what we could identify in a friendship relationship..

The emotion that stands out the most in friends is attraction. That attraction could also be defined as the “chemical” aspect of love experienced for another person.

“My boyfriend is a man whom I see when we agree, for a certain time, we do not exclude third parties, the treatment is cordial and loving, we can have sexual intimacy but only the commitment of friends. In reality, we do not want to explicitly assume the commitment of a formal relationship.”

Attraction is responsible for the desire to kiss and hug your loved one.. However, on many occasions intimacy – in all its meaning – has not yet been consolidated; which arises when thoughts and feelings are shared with others that, in general, exclude others on many levels.

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On the other hand, the commitment has not been consolidated eithersince the decision or promise has not been made to continue by that person’s side despite the ups and downs of the relationship.

Attraction, intimacy and commitment

Of these three qualities of love: attraction, intimacy and commitment, boyfriends have the attraction. Well, in many of these cases, we are talking about incomplete intimacy and non-existent commitment.. This is because if they are very young people, their relationships are shorter.

In youth, many of the bonds that are created are based mainly on physical attraction: “We love going out together and having fun, dancing and having sex, a lot of sex. Our attraction is visceral.”

As young people become more adult, that is, around 20 to 25 years old, many of them value people’s internal qualities more and have more responsibility. Therefore, in late adolescence, the beginning of intimacy and trust become more important for both sexes, apart from passion.

It is only after several relationships of this style that many people begin to think about forming a bond that lasts over time.. During adolescence, romantic relationships are established above all to have fun. They settle down to go to different places and make fun plans.

The rights of friends

The status of friends with benefits also allows you to easily enter and leave the relationship without the pressure of commitment.. But even when they do not want a real commitment as a couple, many of them do not want to maintain a brief relationship in which emotions have a place.

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The latter would be the so-called casual relationships.. They are people who meet at a party or nightclub and then have sex, but no emotional bond is created and they generally do not see each other again.

The relationship between boyfriends can lead to something much deeper and more intimate, or end abruptly due to the appearance of a third party that determines the end of this relationship. They are also called “friends with benefits and no ties.” because they love each other, they care for each other, they care about each other, they make love, but they don’t want a defined commitment.

Boyfriends can be married or single people. In any case, they are aware that their future is uncertain, because sooner or later everything can end. As we see, the difference between these forms of relationship with dating is that In this there is commitment, exemplified in the shared look towards the future, and exclusivity. There is also a clear manifestation of affection, infatuation and love.

Characteristics of friends

Having said all this, we can summarize the characteristics of friends as follows:

Lack of vital project together. In this type of relationship there are no projects and goals as a couple. Such as: living together, starting a family, having children, etc.There is no permanence. This means that there is a beginning and a closing. Furthermore, there is not that habituality that forms in established couples, where there is continuous contact and communication.Deny monogamy. In principle, this type of relationship does not ensure exclusivity, so both can date other people in parallel if they wish.Mutual respect and honesty. Friends with benefits share a friendship relationship, therefore, it meets all the characteristics that it entails. Additionally, as in any relationship, there must be mutual respect and honesty. In other words, the fact that there is no exclusivity or permanence does not mean that they have the right to deceive and disrespect each other.