7 behaviors of people without emotional responsibility

In recent years, more visibility has been given to concepts such as assertiveness, emotional intelligence or emotional responsibility. These are essential ingredients in any healthy relationship and when they are not present, constant conflicts, dissatisfaction and even abusive relationships can arise. But how do we know if those with whom we connect are applying these principles or not? We show you the main behaviors of people without emotional responsibility so that you can decide for yourself.

Although it may seem obvious, in this type of relationship a series of mechanisms take place that confuse us. The person can apply gaslighting -or other types of emotional manipulation- to make us believe that our requests are exaggeratedthat we are not satisfied with anything or that everything is our fault.

Somehow, we come to believe it and silence that inner voice that tells us that the way we are being treated is not right. For this reason, it is advisable to keep in mind those behaviors that represent a red flag and not ignore them.

People without emotional responsibility usually approach relationships from selfishness.

What is emotional responsibility?

First of all, let’s understand that emotional responsibility is the ability to take charge of how our actions affect those with whom we interact. By establishing an emotional bond we obtain a series of benefits (love, company, support, intimacy…), but we also acquire a series of responsibilities towards the other person.

This implies understanding that since feelings are at stake, If we enter into a bond, we agree to take care of the other’s emotions. And this does not mean being responsible for their happiness, or being forced to stay with someone we no longer love, but it does require honesty, communication and empathy.

People without emotional responsibility approach relationships from selfishness and emotional immaturity.. They forget about reciprocity and mutual care and tend to act according to their desires and needs of the moment. Of course, this can cause great harm to the other party, who feels belittled, invalidated, and confused.

Behaviors of people without emotional responsibility

If you suspect that your relationship with someone important to you is unfair or unbalanced, if you do not feel seen, cared for and respected in it, pay attention to the following signs. These behaviors will help you understand if the other person is acting without emotional responsibility.

They act at their own convenience

Being in a relationship does not mean that we have to put aside our needs, interests and preferences. In fact, it is necessary to maintain our identity. HoweverYes, we must know how to combine this with what the other person needs and feels, to find a balance.

When someone seeks only their own convenience, and acts based on what they want without taking their partner into account, they are being emotionally irresponsible. The fact that he does not allow dialogue or evades negotiations, and frequently acts selfishly, should set off alarm bells.

They invalidate the emotions of others

We must be able to express how we feel in any relationship without the other minimizing or ridiculing us. However, There are those who systematically invalidate the other person, belittling their emotions, calling her exaggerated or crazy and ignoring her words.

They are not willing to listen to complaints, requests or needs of the other much less to make any changes to contribute to their well-being. On the contrary, they blame whoever is in front of them and never admit that they may have any degree of responsibility in this regard.

They break promises and commitments

The breakdown of trust is also one of the behaviors of people without emotional responsibility. And it is that His actions are incongruent with his words; They say one thing and act in a completely opposite way, causing great confusion in the other party.

In addition, they establish agreements or make promises that they then systematically break. They fail to keep their word, and this generates great uncertainty, anguish and distrust in the other..

They lie or hide information

Sincerity is the best policy, but not always the most comfortable. Therefore, people without emotional responsibility They tend to lie to obtain benefit or to save themselves trouble.

They can deceive about important matters (such as having multiple partners at the same time without the parties knowing), or even about more banal aspects, such as the reason for canceling a date. In any case, it is done to satisfy one’s own desire without having to worry about how it will affect the other person.

Besides, It is common for these people to lie about their feelings.perhaps exaggerating them or deluding the other when, in reality, they do not seek to commit to that bond nor do they feel what they say they feel.

They disappear or remain silent

Another of the most common behaviors is the tendency to disappear, to cut off communication and contact without giving explanations. Sometimes this silence lasts a few days and the person returns when they feel like it. Other times, it disappears forever, leaving the other party in a sea of ​​confusion, guilt and doubt.

People without emotional responsibility do not know how to communicateexpress what they are feeling or needing and take the easy route of ghosting the other. Additionally, they can use that silence as a form of punishment and manipulation to gain power in the relationship.

Avoid uncomfortable conversations

If you try to have an open and honest conversation about the state of your relationship with one of these people, they will most likely refuse to collaborate. And it is that They tend to avoid situations that involve being vulnerable, accept one’s own mistakes or talk about uncomfortable topics. Let us remember that they only seek to obtain benefits in the relationship, but are not willing to assume the natural disadvantages.

They don’t respect limits

On the other hand, They are incapable of respecting the limits set. No matter how many times the other person expresses that a behavior bothers or hurts them, empathy is conspicuous by its absence.

Thus, they will continue to repeat this behavior without respecting the stop that the other has set; and, in the same way, they will not be able to assertively mark their own limits.

People without emotional responsibility do not take into account the needs of others nor do they know how to respect their limits.

People without emotional responsibility create unbalanced relationships

Ultimately, people who exhibit these behaviors create unbalanced relationships, as they seek and accept care, but do not offer it in return. Lack of communication, consideration and honesty they make the link confusing, unstable and harmful for the other partywhich can seriously damage your self-esteem and cause suffering.

For this reason, if you recognize such behaviors in any of your relationships, it is important that you do not minimize them and take action about it; You have the right to be respected and treated with sincerity and empathy. On the other hand, if you are the one who falls into these behaviors frequently, analyze the reasons that lead you to do so. Maybe you need to work on your assertiveness and emotional intelligence, and a professional can help you achieve this.

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