32 phrases to detect low self-esteem

We have already talked about self-esteem in this section, understanding it as the way we relate to ourselves or, in other words, how we see ourselves, understand ourselves and love ourselves. Possess a healthy self-esteem is a guarantee of balance and mental health.

On the contrary, if our self-esteem is damaged, this fact predisposes us to suffer various emotional problems, such as depression, insecurity, anxiety attacks, physical problems, somatisms, etc. We could say that self-esteem forms the foundations that sustain our personality.

Recognize if we have a weak self-esteem and vulnerable can help us to identify aspects of our personality that we should work on. But this is not an easy task, since damaged self-esteem can have multiple manifestations, some clearer, but others not so obvious to distinguish.

How to recognize low self esteem

To help with this task recognize low self esteem (in ourselves or in our acquaintances), I have compiled phrases and characteristics that, throughout my extensive professional experience as a psychologist, I have observed how the people who came to my office repeated them over and over again.

I propose an exercise that I do in my office when we work on someone’s self-esteem, print the following list and mark the phrases with which you identify (if you identify with any).

Abuses in social relationships

Others have me for a kind person, a good friend and always ready for anything. I never complain, I never protest, I always agree. I do not speak not to disturb. I rarely give my opinion on any topic. I put the needs of others before my own. I always adapt to what the group decides. What others say is fine, it will be that I am wrong. If they walk away from me, it is because I have done something wrong. People don’t talk to me because there is something wrong with me. Huge concern for what others think. I’d rather keep a defective product than ask for a replacement. I doubt myself and my instinct. If I don’t like something or someone offends me, I prefer to keep quiet. I’ve broken up, but my ex touches my ass every time we see each other.

negative view of self

I blame myself for everything bad that happens and I don’t value anything good that I do. Pessimistic assessment of life and of themselves. I will not be able. I sure fail. If something goes well, the credit belongs to the group. If something goes wrong, it’s my fault. If someone looks at me on the street, I think it’s because I’m fat.

with the children

I am unable to defend my child when others (family, school, etc.) attack or harass her. I do not assume the task of being a mother/father. I let my two year old bite me. I give children adult responsibilities, which do not correspond to them. I ask my daughter if she should change jobs.

Self-boycott of the life project

I have many ideas, but I never carry them out. I have a hard time starting something new. Fear to fail. For not failing, I do nothing.

Need to attract attention

I talk loud, I have a thunderous laugh, I can’t stop telling jokes. I am the queen of the party, I sing in all the karaokes. I think about everything, even if I have no idea. Everyone has to pay attention to me and I get upset when someone doesn’t. I go out with the popular guy, even though I don’t like him, because I feel important when I go with him.

If you have recognized yourself in some of these phrasesyou have already begun to walk the path to your healing.

Look in your past causes of your low self esteem, work so that they do not continue to affect you and to love you again as you really deserve. Also, use yourself thoroughly to recover the power of decision over your actions and your present life.

Remember, as I always comment on this blog, that you are the architect of your liberation. Trust yourself.

I know this is hard work, but it’s worth it. Your freedom awaits you on the other side of the road.