3 keys to getting out of a codependent relationship

A codependent relationship is one in which The members of the couple are not only addicted to dependence on the other but also need to help and care constantly to feel good. That is, they forget about themselves and focus all their attention on the other. The main problem is that this type of relationship is based on insecurity. That is why it is so important to get out of a codependent relationship, since the rest of the threads that weave it, in addition to insecurity, are fear, dependency, low self-esteem and unhappiness.

The main support of this type of relationship is emotional dependence, that extreme and continuous emotional need to be there for and for the other and to be nobody without them. In fact, due to the low self-esteem of both involved, both will try to find happiness through their partner. Thus, most of their lives will revolve around their relationship. Thus, it will be very difficult – or even impossible – for them to extend their personal life beyond the other.

Below, we show some keys to getting out of a codependent relationship. So, you will be able to better recognize the origin of the problem and know what to do if you find yourself in this situation.

Whether or not to end the relationship

First of all, it is best to recognize the decisions that have been made throughout the relationship. This first step It will be based on analyzing the path that has been followed so far, in the most objective way. possible. The idea is to evaluate whether you continue with your partner because you want to or because you don’t want to hurt them. If this last reason is the real one, it is important that you realize that it is not your responsibility to deal with it.

Therefore, if you realize that the relationship is no longer serving you, You must make the decision to put an end to it. In these types of relationships, people neglect their own needs. Therefore, when leaving a codependent relationship, you must have a strong attitude and be aware that it is the best option for both.

To end the relationship, it is best to talk to the other person. This way you can make him understand the problems that the situation brings to both of you from your perspective and why the best option is to break up. Right now, It will be very important to act calmly, since it is likely that the other person will not receive the decision well.. If you stay calm, you will be able to better manage a reaction of anger or sadness from the other person.

Coping with codependent relationship behaviors

Once the breakup is formalized, it doesn’t hurt to analyze what positive aspects the relationship gave us. It’s possible that, now that you can think about it in more perspective, you realize that it was preventing you from developing. When leaving a codependent relationship, people often feel happier and more energetic as time goes by. This will help you stay firm in the face of the breakup.

Still, after leaving a codependent relationship, it is also common to feel abandoned. Breaking the dynamic in which one of the people largely took care of the other means that you feel a certain emptiness in your day-to-day life. If you see that these feelings are very intense, Going to therapy may be of great help to manage them..

On the other hand, Ending the relationship will give you the opportunity to start meeting your own needs.. This is something you couldn’t do before; But now, you will be able to dedicate yourself completely to yourself, without the need for another person to define how important you are.

Dealing with the repercussions of separation

Finally, to avoid falling back into dependence on the relationship, it will be important to create physical distance with the other person. You should do your best to spend less time with her and keep busy with your own needs.. Some recommendations are to change apartments or start interacting with other people.

On the other hand also You must accept the sadness and discomfort that you will experience after the breakup. and separation. Experiencing these feelings, rather than repressing them, is essential to moving forward. Only in this way can you avoid falling into feelings of distrust or fear towards other people or possibilities of starting a new relationship.

Little by little, the sadness and discomfort will fade away, while Satisfying your needs will bring you greater and greater happiness. However, having good social support is essential to turn the pages. Hence, it is recommended to spend time with your family and friends. These can help you in your difficult moments or when you have to make a complicated decision.

Lastly, don’t forget that It is very important to spend time alone to process everything that happened and manage your emotional world. In this way, you will be able to heal wounds, recover your self-esteem and be prepared to live happily, whether from being single or in a new relationship.

You might be interested…