Many associate the word “selfish” with an unpleasant person who thinks only of himself. According to psychologists, however, on certain occasions selfishness is not only not harmful, but can also be beneficial, especially to give a reality check to those who are used to taking advantage of others.
We, from awesome.club, we’ve gathered examples of situations in which demonstrating self-respect is more than adequate to put troublesome individuals in their place. Check out some signs of healthy selfishness to learn how to defend your rights and personal space.
Accept yourself, but don’t ignore your imperfections
Every human being has flaws, which constitute the appearance and character of each one. But sometimes some people lack common sense and tend to emphasize the faults of others. In this case, the best way out to combat insolence is a sharp but smart answer.
Don’t try to please anyone
Pleasing everyone is a flawed idea from the beginning. It is especially harmful when children are taught this type of behavior. Honesty and good manners are always in fashion, unlike flattery for no reason. If you don’t try to please someone for no reason and it makes you feel good, then it’s for a good reason, and it pays to be selfish.
Arguing and expressing your opinion calmly and transparently
There is nothing wrong with openly demanding what is rightfully yours. This observation brings us to the phrase of the fairy godmother addressed to Cinderella in one of the versions of the story: “You can’t not go to a ball when you deserve it”. We can all identify with Cinderella, but instead of a magic wand, we have our rights that we must defend.
Don’t be shy about expressing your point of view
There are times when we do something against our will just because we are forced to take on other people’s responsibilities. In this situation, it is essential to take some time and think: is the request really that important? If the answer is no, it is advisable to refuse without feeling guilty.
Knowing how to say “no” when the request goes against one’s own interests and plans
How many times have you sacrificed yourself for the sake of others, for fear of ruining a relationship? Of course, situations can be different, but there are people who want to take advantage of your kindness. It is worth mentioning that it is essential to learn to use the word “no” to make the speech stronger and more sincere, as it does not have a bad connotation, as we are used to believing. Refusing requests from those who invade your personal space is not a shameful attitude at all. For example, if your friend knows that you work a lot and come home late, but you continue to use her as a babysitter for her child, it’s worth stopping to think before helping her again.
don’t feel guilty
In the past, the woman assumed full responsibility for the house, but today this attitude is considered outdated. Many women began to dedicate more time to taking care of themselves, detaching themselves from the image of housewives, and they don’t feel guilty about it. It’s great that sharing household chores among family members is no longer something shameful.
avoid making promises
One of the psychological manipulation techniques is to get another person to make a promise. But those who are confident don’t commit to doing something against their will. First, he thinks about the possibility of keeping his word, and not simply pleasing the other.
Do not give in to manipulations
Several service companies give discounts to reward customer loyalty. But it turns out that even serious companies cross the line in an attempt to make consumers want to continue using their services. A short and categorical “no” is capable of ending persistence. That simple.
Don’t get distracted by secondary tasks
Healthy selfishness presupposes knowing exactly what we need and moving in that direction. Even if more interesting activities come along the way, it’s important to prioritize tasks. This is probably the reason why successful people don’t step on competitors to achieve success, but rather have self-control and therefore provoke envy.
Be resistant to criticism
Some people make others feel constrained to get what they want. For example, to sit in a comfortable seat in public transport, taking advantage of your age or status. But these manipulations don’t work with the egoists described in this post — in this specific case, as long as there are more places available — and they don’t rush to apologize before assessing the situation.
Putting the misfits in their place
Being able to defend your position at the right time is worth a lot. Keeping sassy guys from invading your personal space is an attitude that should stay out of criticism. For example, once you give in to a charming smile and charming lines from a neighbor, her belongings will end up propped up on your front door, blocking the way.
Embrace your inner child
Healthy selfishness is also manifested through self-love, whether on happy or sad days and regardless of age. Society often tries to impose limits and standards on us, making us live according to pre-established rules.
Have you ever faced a situation where you had to act selfishly? Tell us how it went.
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