You are stronger than the envy of others

Envy is a feeling (or passion if it is very intense) of an unpleasant nature that arises when considering what another person has or has achieved.. The term envy comes from the Latin word “invidere”, which means “to see with evil eyes”. The envious person looks with evil eyes on the qualities, successes or possessions of others. They constitute for him a source of unpleasant feelings and deep dissatisfaction.

Being envious is something intimate that is not usually confessed. Rarely have you heard of someone who is envious of you in a serious tone. It is somewhat embarrassing to admit that someone else’s good can inspire deep inner discomfort, sometimes filled with hostility towards that person.

On other occasions we try to justify this feeling of envy through value judgments. Judgments, which although they may have some basis, are so nuanced by our emotional state that they are not usually very objective. By this mechanism, Sometimes envy gives rise to slander or defamation through this mechanism.

It is difficult to find a person who has never felt envy throughout their life. Although almost no one admits to being envious, you only have to observe someone who achieves many successes in a short time to realize how they are later the object of this envy disguised as criticism.

Is there healthy envy or is it a desire to improve?

There are situations that have certain points of connection with envy, but that belong to different orders. Sometimes We say we are envious of someone because we admire their qualities or how well they make the most of their abilities. We would like to be like him in this. It is not about envy, but rather a desire to improve that materializes in a person whom we take as an example.

Other times, feelings of indignation may arise due to the triumph of a person that seems undeserved to us. Also, in a promotion, we may believe that she is not sufficiently prepared to carry out the function entrusted to her. This thought is not always due to a more or less hidden envy, but sometimes there are objective reasons to make this assessment.. This happens especially if they are not people close to us and if their success or position falls within a field of action different from ours.

On other occasions it is, more than envy, the fear of someone’s prosperity: we fear that once placed in a superior position they may harm us in some way.. Other times it is more about jealousy than envy. We suffer when others get the affection or admiration that we would like certain people to have with us exclusively.

Finally, Envy should not be confused with the disgust that can arise after learning about a person’s success or stroke of fortune. towards which feelings of hatred or desires for revenge are maintained. If evil is left to her, her fortune does not produce envy, but rather a frustration of those hostile desires.

Pride and selfishness are closely linked to envy

Pride and selfishness are two personality traits closely linked to envy. Due to pride, a person is not willing to accept that others are valued more by others. She considers them equal or inferior and is not willing to accept that they acquire greater wealth or have more success. So much so, that in envy, comparisons with other people are very frequent as a source of self-valuation and self-affirmation of the self.

Egoism involves an exaggerated desire to possess everything for oneself. It is an attitude in which being focused on oneself predominates, ignoring the interests of others. Thus, the feelings and concerns of others remain somewhat on the sidelines, as if they did not exist or were unimportant. What has been achieved by others is lived as if it were something of their own stolen by them. Others have obtained something that, in justice, belonged to us and that “they do not deserve.”

Pride and selfishness are mobilized by desires for self-affirmation and defense mechanisms of one’s own self-worth by comparison with others.. They are impregnated with value judgments about others, which lack objectivity, since they are deformed by affective qualities. This is the scenario in which envy makes an appearance.

7 signs that there is someone who envies me

A true friendship is one that helps you grow and be a better person. However, you may have wondered on some occasion if your friends are envious of you or if it is simply admiration. To clarify this point, I leave you 7 signs that could indicate that your friends are envious of you:

Your friends are not interested in you. What’s more, they distance themselves when you achieve some great success or triumph. Sometimes your friends do not keep the secrets that you trust them. If your friends speak badly about other people, they may also do so about you. Your friends hide the truth through false flattery towards you. Your friends speak badly about the people you love. They are only with you in good times, but in bad times they leave you alone. Your friends do not respect your opinion.

7 tips for dealing with an envious person

The first step is to learn to recognize it. Sometimes it is easy, but other times it can be extremely complicated. That is why I explained a series of criteria in the previous section. Secondly, once those people are recognized, It may be advisable to follow the following tips to cope:

Look at the negative comments that person makes to you. When you have 3, then the conversation ends.Surround yourself with people who support you. This way, the envious person will be less likely to make you feel bad by being exposed to the group. Be friends with someone in their circle. This will make her feel like the odd one out in the group.Tell that person whose negativity bothers you. This may make her rethink the way she treats you, although it won’t always be like that.Praise the person who envies you. With this you will be able to disarm her. Share your difficulties and negative qualities with her. This way, she will feel that you are not perfect and she will stop envying you a little less.Help her improve. Envious people often have a lack of self-esteem.

If none of this works, the best thing to do in these cases is to stay away from that person.. It’s okay to change friends or stop having contact with a person who was previously our friend, but now with envy of them it hurts us. We have the right to choose who we surround ourselves with and who we want to spend our time with.

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