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What is rejection sensitive dysphoria?

No one enjoys feeling rejected. However, not all people are able to find a way out, remaining trapped in it… The question is, what can we do?

Rejection-sensitive dysphoria It is an extreme emotional reaction to the perception of real or imagined rejection. The person who experiences it feels overwhelmed when they are judged, excluded or criticized.

Thus, you may feel like a failure in the face of other people’s judgment, feel that everyone is against you, or feel like a whirlwind of disproportionate emotions. The feeling is so intense that the person remains stuck in the fact and is not able to continue normally with the rest of the tasks. Mental rumination takes over and you find it extremely difficult to let go of your negative thoughts.

Rejection sensitive dysphoria is not a disorder classified in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), but it is no less real. Currently, it is considered a disorder made up of a set of symptoms that are often associated with other conditions, as we will see below.

We don’t really know why some people feel so overwhelmed by rejection. It is generally considered that there is not a single reason, but a set of factors that promote that reaction. Let’s look at some of its features in more detail.

Why do we dislike feeling rejection so much?

Experiencing uncomfortable emotions, such as sadness or anger, when we feel rejected, is normal. It is part of the human condition, and in fact it plays in favor of our ability to adapt.

If we travel thousands of years ago, when we lived in nomadic tribes and depended on hunting and gathering, people needed to be in groups to survive. Not doing so decreased our chances of survival due to all the dangers that loomed over us.

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For that reason, at that time We develop a series of strategies to stay within the group. From these we learned that our behavior had to conform to the tribe; Otherwise, we ran the risk of being expelled – or in other words, being much more unprotected against environmental threats.

Today it is very different, and our survival does not depend on belonging to a tribe. However, we continue to be social beings and therefore we can experience emotional pain when we carry out a behavioral pattern that is not approved by others.

How does rejection-sensitive dysphoria manifest?

Each person who feels rejection has a different way of experiencing the experience. However, some of the most common symptoms are the following:

Approval-seeking behavior.High self-demand.Feeling of extreme shame.Low self-esteem.Anger.Irritability.Aggression. Anxiety. Fear of rejection.Sadness.Despair. Need to control the feared situation.Avoidance of social contact.Somatic manifestations such as digestive discomfort or headache.

These symptoms can be experienced at the time of the interaction or later, when it has ended. Furthermore, they do not have to manifest themselves all at once, since this will depend on each person and the specific situation.

Who is more susceptible to suffering from it?

There are several profiles that are susceptible to experiencing rejection-sensitive dysphoria. For example, the people who have been subjected at an early age to strong rejection, especially parental. Another group would be people with social anxiety, since they tend to feel bad when they have the perception that they are being evaluated.

Other types of people are those who experience hypersensitivity. This hypersensitivity does not always have to be linked to highly sensitive people. A person may be going through a difficult time, feeling much more emotionally vulnerable and experiencing more pain in the face of rejection. This hypersensitivity can end up greatly limiting a person’s life, especially if they do not learn to manage their emotions appropriately.

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A group susceptible to experiencing rejection-sensitive dysphoria is people who suffer from autism spectrum disorder (ASD); This is because their emotionality is usually high. Therefore, if they perceive that they are rejected or criticized, they may feel much more upset than most.

Finally, another group that frequently experiences rejection-sensitive dysphoria are people with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). This is due to the difficulty of adequately managing executive skills such as self-control or cognitive flexibility. In some ways, people with ADHD find it more difficult to relativize, distance themselves, and get out of the line of thought they currently maintain.

Treatment for rejection-sensitive dysphoria

There is no pre-established treatment as such to treat rejection-sensitive dysphoria. However, numerous tools can be learned to help them experience their emotions less intensely. Let’s look at some of them.

Apply cognitive restructuring. Being more aware of our thoughts, detecting the most irrational ones and replacing them with less harmful ones is an excellent way to start combating rejection-sensitive dysphoria.Learn to relativize. Putting everything that happens to us into perspective will probably make us experience rejection with less intensity.Increase resilience. Building a discourse of improvement and strength around negative experiences is an excellent strategy to leave victimization behind.Know stories of improvement. Knowing that other people have managed to improve their lives despite obstacles inspires us to want to do the same with ours.Improve communication skills. Knowing how we can express our emotions more appropriately will reinforce our security and reduce our fear of not knowing how to act.Strengthen self-esteem. Gaining self-confidence is a very good way to reduce the importance of other people’s opinions.Lead a healthy lifestyle. Getting enough sleep, eating real foods, and exercising regularly will help us feel better and manage our emotions more appropriately.Reduce stress level. A high level of stress can further exacerbate rejection-sensitive dysphoria, so incorporating activities such as meditation or mindfulness They can be of great help.

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It is important to keep in mind that feeling upset when someone judges us or criticizes us is normal, we all prefer to be praised than rejected. Nevertheless, The usual thing is that the uncomfortable emotions generated by rejection tend to disappear in a short time..

If in your case those annoying emotions last for days or you notice that they overcome you and condition your daily life, perhaps it is a good time to consult with an expert therapist in emotional management. Although rejection-sensitive dysphoria has no pre-established treatment, there are many strategies you can learn to minimize its negative impact on your life.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

American Psychiatric Association (2018). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders(DSM-5), 5th Ed. Madrid: Editorial Médica Panamericana. Bondü, R., Esser, G. (2015). Justice and rejection sensitivity in children and adolescents with ADHD symptoms. European Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, Vol. 24, 185–198. . doi: https://doi.org/10.1007/s00787-014-0560-9Rojas, E. (2014). How to overcome anxiety. The definitive work to overcome stress, phobias and obsessions. Barcelona: Planet.

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