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What is emotional competence?

Emotional competence describes a person’s ability to express their own emotions freely. And you can learn!

Emotional competence is described as a person’s ability to express their own emotions freely. However, this term is quite close to emotional intelligence. The difference between the two is that the latter is a kind of core of the set of skills for reasoning with emotions. For its part, emotional competence refers to the achievement of a certain level of emotional achievement.

This competence can be learned and trained. And it determines a person’s ability to interact constructively with others. Besides, It is based on self-awareness, It is based on the recognition of individual emotions and how they affect other people and on the ability to maintain emotional control.

It must be taken into account that, for this, We must be able to understand our own emotions before being able to value those of others.

“At least 80% of success in adulthood comes from emotional intelligence”

-Daniel Goleman-

Social competence, necessary for success in relationships

One dimension of emotional competence is social competence. According to studies, this refers to the fulfillment of the demands of the context. This is, the ability to respond in line with what others feel.

Social skills are very important in a work environment. Likewise, to achieve success in relationships, it is important to know how to communicate effectively and know how to manage conflicts.

Through emotional competence, human beings have the ability to act in accordance with our own emotions and those experienced by other people.

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Recognition of personal emotions opens the possibility of responding appropriately to the emotions of others. Without previously knowing your own, it is difficult to identify those of others, and even help or feel empathy for other people.

Knowing our own emotions allows us to recognize those of others and develop empathy

However, this is something that We are not usually used to doing it, that is why it is very difficult for us. In fact, learning to know our own emotions is something that is not usually given much attention at an early age. Consequently, these adults may lack that knowledge of their emotional identity as they grow up.

Emotional competence also encompasses aspects such as awareness and emotional regulation.as well as autonomy in the expression of emotions and the ability to evaluate them in terms of their intensity, valence and orientation.

Health problems related to emotional competence

Many experts believe that a lack of emotional competence causes different difficulties, which can lead to a repression of emotions. So, not expressing themcan lead to a long-term deterioration of the person’s physical and mental health. They also increase stress levels, which can cause hypertension, rapid weight gain or loss, or fatigue, so learning to self-regulate these can be effective.

Poor relationships with other people can cause suffering, due to the emotional incompetence perceived by the affected person. Which, in the end, generates great dissatisfaction and even frustration due to the lack of emotional exchange that it entails.

Although there are many difficulties that can hinder the development of emotional competence, Emotional intelligence plays an important role in a person’s ability to learn it.

For those people who suffer from mental illnesses or problems that interfere with their skills, it is important, as a first step, to help them develop their emotional intelligence. When a person is able to discriminate some emotions from others, he can begin to learn how to apply these emotions to daily life.

“There is no separation of mind and emotions; “Emotions, thoughts and learning are related”

-Eric Jensen-

If you repress your emotions or have serious difficulties in being able to manage, identify and express them, you should know that this has a solution. Go to your trusted therapist to accompany you along this path.

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Emotional competence is learned, although patience will be necessary, since what is learned may not have an immediate effect. Be patient, because it will most likely be rather progressive. Do not harm your health because of fear or fear of facing what can be learned. Nobody is born knowing everything.

Intrapersonal and interpersonal intelligence

According to Howard Gardner, there is not just one intelligence, but several. Among them we find intrapersonal and interpersonal intelligence.

The intrapersonal It refers to the emotional knowledge of oneself. That is, the ability to control our emotions, regulate them and internalize them. interpersonal It would be intelligence directed towards others, that is, aimed at recognizing other people’s emotions and feelings. The empathy would enter inside her.

According to Gardner, intelligences are not static, but can be developed. Each of us is born with each of these intelligences, however, we are usually able to develop one or more of them. Emotional competence would reside in both types of intelligence.

Thus, our emotional competence can be improved. And one of the benefits of developing it is the possible substantial improvement that we can perceive in our relationship with ourselves and with others.

Emotional competence is essential for self-knowledge and to learn to face everyday situations in healthier and more constructive ways.

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