Social phobia: fear of being judged

Social phobia is a limiting disorder that produces enormous psychological suffering. Let’s see what it consists of.

Social phobia is an irrational fear that causes great discomfort in social relationships. Those who suffer from this phobia try to stay distant and isolated, since they dislike and distress any type of relationship and interaction with other people.

It is a very limiting type of phobia, since human contact is basic. We need to relate to our environment in all important areas of our life, whether at work or family, meeting a potential partner or starting and maintaining a friendship.

Those who suffer from social phobia avoid all types of circumstances in which they have to be forced to interact with other people.. However, in many cases this is not possible. Thus, he has no choice but to face situations that are very difficult for him, especially because he cannot get the idea out of his mind that he is constantly being judged.

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave person is not the one who does not feel fear, but the one who conquers that fear.”

-Nelson Mandela-

Although there are many phobias, social phobia is one of the most misunderstood and disabling.. Any social event, parties, meetings – in short, situations in which you have to expose yourself to other people – are the most feared experiences. From its anticipation an escape is born that feeds the feeling of anxiety.

The deepest rooted fear in this phobia is that of being faced with compromising situations, which are embarrassing and humiliating. They have this nature either due to the consequences of their own fear and anxiety, or due to their own belief of feeling incapable of facing said situation.

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Those who suffer from social phobia feel misunderstood and somewhat marginalized.. Its complexity and importance lies in the fact that the person needs social contact that at the same time avoids. Thus, the person feels within a center of forces that produce an unpleasant sensation.

In fact, great anxiety occurs in situations in which a social interaction is anticipated, in which some type of social contact and approach may occur. The psychophysiological activation that occurs in these situations can generate symptoms such as: tachycardia, anxiety, tremors, flushing, stuttering and continuous sweating.

Some social phobias are limited to specific situations, such as speaking in public or meeting new people.

For this phobia to be diagnosed as such, it must be limiting for the person who suffers from it, in addition to having lasted at least 6 months. Furthermore, its presence generates serious discomfort, preventing the person’s development in various areas of their daily lives.

The patient, as a result of this discomfort, will feel strong anxiety due to the expectation that other people will form a bad opinion about him. Therefore, he will avoid all social situations that cause the symptoms described above.

Differential diagnosis with other disorders

Since this phobia includes symptoms and behaviors typical of other disorders, it is necessary to differentiate it to provide specific treatment. Let’s see it in detail:

Panic disorder: In this pathology, the appearance of anxiety attacks is spontaneous, not in response to social exposure.Generalized anxiety disorder: In social phobia, anxiety appears when entering a social setting, but in this example a constant level of anxiety is maintained.Post-traumatic stress disorder: there is a deeply painful event at the center of the subject’s avoidant behaviors, rather than social situations in which nothing traumatic has ever occurred.

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The causes of this phobia can be multiple. The most sensitive period where it can develop is during adolescence, a time when it is usually related to parents who have been overprotective. It can also appear from a lack of social skills.

Once the person has acquired this phobia, it is best to see a specialist. The main goals to work on will be the control of irrational fear and the discomfort caused.

We have difficulty accepting and expressing our needs; In our fear of being judged we judge others.

The subtype of generalized social phobia (that is, the most severe) is related to a genetic component. First- and second-degree relatives of patients with this condition have a 2 to 6 times greater risk of developing it. However, psychosocial factors should never be ignored.

It is important to start treatment for social phobia as soon as possible. In general, psychoactive drugs are combined with psychotherapy, so that the patient is treated with antidepressants and/or anxiolytics while receiving therapy.

Since the objectives are to extinguish anxiety, eliminate avoidance behaviors and, ultimately, recover the functionality and quality of life of the subject, the psychological treatment of choice is usually cognitive behavioral. Different strategies are carried out in it:

Exposure: Since it is a phobia, the patient will be exposed to situations that cause anxiety gradually.Relaxation and anxiety control techniques: to put them into practice in critical situations.Mindfulness.Cognitive restructuring.Training in social skills.

Our fear of being judged

One way or another, We all have this fear that others will judge us for our abilities., acts or feelings, whether past, present or even anticipated. The problem manifests itself when it begins to be obsessive, becoming limiting and pathological.

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The usual complaint is that we are not understood by others and that no one understands us. We complain about the lack of empathy without realizing that our attitude and our actions are generators of that loneliness and promoters of the lack of affection that we ultimately demand.

Awareness and looking towards oneself helps to avoid falling into the trap of thinking that everything that happens to us is the fault of others.. There are consequences in our way of seeing things and acting, so we are also responsible for what we end up attracting to our experience.

“Sometimes we are too stubborn to admit that we have needs, because in our society need is equated with weakness. When we turn our anger inward, it often expresses itself as feelings of depression and guilt. Anger contained within changes our impressions of the past and distorts our perspective of current reality. All this old anger becomes unfinished business, not only with respect to others, but with ourselves.”

-Elisabeth Kübler-Ross-