Martirio: “I have educated my partners in equality”

She remains faithful to her extravagant combs and her hidden look. The singer who renewed the copla with lyrics like that one I'm bad, about the housewife overwhelmed by her life, she experimented as an actress in the nineties and has continued to draw a career rich in sounds (flamenco, boleros, jazz€) and collaborations. Her new album, ´From a strange world, Sings by Chavela´, evokes a character he adores. “A free, dignified woman, with a special aura.” Martyrdom also exudes authenticity and determination. She says her family gave her strength and self-esteem. Her father was “a powerful person, the man of the house; a theater lover, cultured,” and her mother, “someone sensitive, sang zarzuela wonderfully.” She thanks them for having been educated – along with her brother – in the love of art. Something that can iron out differences from childhood. “It's good to make them fall in love with something creative, it will always accompany them and make their lives more beautiful.” In her case, that passion has permeated her son, an anthropologist and guitarist. “An exceptional being.”

Think that men and women are, without a doubt, different. And that progress has been made towards equality, but there is a long way to go. She has hope in what she calls “the new man.” “A strong, brave, assertive and sensitive man who understands that by having an intelligent woman at his side and capable of seeking life as equals, he also wins. The relationship is healthier and there is no room for bad treatment. “Women must also avoid certain atavisms. It is a matter of education.” As an example of that new man, advanced in her time, she cites the one she admired, José Luis Sampedro, who prefaced her autobiographical book, “someone who gave hope to human beings.”

At 59 years old, she lives quietly in sentimental matters. “Now I feel love like something more general, I met a lot of people, with a sweetheart who makes me happy from time to time, but without a relationship. I want to be around my things.” She has been, she says, very enamoring. “I have felt very loved and I have loved a lot.” She was a very young mother, at 20 years old, she married and divorced; “but he is a great guy, an excellent father, I was with him for many years.” He claims to feel affection towards his exes. “When I see them I give them hugs that make them crunch.” Without false modesty, he believes that he has “educated” them in equality. “When we have met later with their new partners, I have seen them very different. I think I made things easier for those who came later,” she says, smiling.

In any case, not all are experiences to remember. There was also some “inmate” in his life. “Those men who leave corpses wherever they go. It's difficult to get rid of it, it's like a drug. If you free yourself, you are stronger“. Like Chavela, he advocates “erasing resentment”: “Only when you forgive can you love again; If not, you age your soul.”

The woman should also modify some aspect. “We are very controlling, we want everything explained to us. And the couple works better if each one has their own plot.”

Flee from any humiliation, obvious or subtle. And the lack of empathy. “Men find it difficult to understand us. Women are a very complex world, they are subjugated by how we are, but they are studying us all the time and wondering what we want. That's why they often go crazy to go with their friends. With them they expand because they reach few intimate moments between them, they do not usually talk about topics that are not foreign. We connect our emotions. “That saves us.”

Maybe we should give them clues? “Absolutely, communication is essential and especially for women. That 'I don't talk during the day and then I go to bed with you' I can't, wow. They, yes. I think it has to do with genetics “I need to be at peace; if not, my thorn is there and I can't give myself up.”

He is seduced by the voice: “It is an internal x-ray, it reveals everything to me.” She likes intelligent men who are fond of art. And brown. But if there's one thing he admires, it's the “bricolator”, “the one who fixes a problem at home in a flash… It conquers me!“, he admits laughing.