Funny Phrases for Status – Phrases for Whats

I’m over it, I only cry when I remember. 😂😒

Work until the neighbors say “you can only be stealing”. 😂😂

Waking up earlier to be late is my routine. 😂👌

Looking at my problems and not talking now, bro. 😂😒

I even warned myself… but I didn’t listen. 😂😒

Objective: food reeducation. Obstacle: food. 😂😂

If there’s competition, I’m quitting. 😂👌

I stopped with this business of one hand washes the other: it’s my turn, there’s never any water. 😂😒

Work hard to see if I can buy the patience I lack. 😂👌

I need new enemies, the old ones are starting to like me, I’m charming! 😂😂

A stray bullet has more direction than me! 😂👌

Sleepy I go to bed, sleepy I get up. 😂😒

Look, if there’s one thing I trust, it’s my distrust. 😂😂

I’m moving away from so many people, that in a few days the solution will be to talk to the plants. 😂👌

Horrible to be poor and not be able to break things when you’re angry. 😂😒

There’s not the slightest possibility that this will work… I’m in. 😂😂

The person with disrupted sleep wants war with just about everyone. 😂😒

If it’s not to be late, I’d rather not go. 😂😂

Guys, I’m just like a child, don’t promise me anything. 😂😒

We’ve barely arrived from New Year’s Eve and we’re already thinking about Carnival, we’re not worth anything. 😂😂

There’s not the slightest possibility that this will work….. I’m in. 😂😂

I became what I feared the most: whoever unmarks the ride to stay at home. 😂😒

Next year I’ll take a course, this year was just to test a business. 😂👌

What a complicated situation huh… I’m going to take a nap. 😂😂

The “you only live once” argument has already made me spend so much money.. 😂😒

I wish I didn’t become an aggressive bug when I’m hungry 😂👌

It must be very chic to work, study, go to the gym and still be able to sleep well 😂😂

So many days of fighting, I’m already getting violent… 😂😂

Hi, I noticed you only hang out with pretty people. Want to try something different? 😂😂

Do not argue. Say “you can believe it” and leave. 😂👌

I wanted a love triangle: me, an apartment and a good job. 😂😂

The young man when he is sleepy doesn’t want to talk to anyone. 😂👌

The mistake of the human being is to think that everything will work out! 😂😒

Let’s sleep that tomorrow has a lot of wrong decision to make. 😂😂

A life summed up in: “I wasn’t going to buy anything, but it was on sale”.. 😂😒

Erasing the conversation and pretending the person never existed, that’s how I live. 😂😂

You want to be happy, ok, I’m here. Now if you want to continue suffering, I can do nothing 😂👌

Go to shit but go down the sidewalk cause I care about you baby 😂😂

I was born with the curse of laughing in serious moments. 😂😒👌

What part of “I need to save money” I don’t understand?! 😂😂

Guys, seriously, I’ve been single for a long time, I don’t have an ex to get over, no, you can hit on me! 😅😅

Alas me doing exactly what I said was wrong to do.. 😂👌😒

I wanted to sleep with the ones I like, but unfortunately not everyone fits in my bed. 😂😂

Return the ML of perfume I used to make you smell good! 😂😅

Fabio Jr. sings the song soul mate and has been divorced 7 times. I will believe in love how? 😂😒

To date me, you have to have health insurance, you might have a heart attack of anger. 😒😂

When I was younger I was terrified of being drunk, now I know that we don’t hurt anyone! 😂😂

New season of the year: eutonohell! 😂😂👌

I live in the impasse between “I want to save money” and “you only live once”. 😂😂

If you fall, I’ll be here – said the ground! 😂😂

Even the comma makes a difference and your opinion doesn’t! 😂👌

May the day be as good as my bed was… 😂😒

Allergy? Have! I’m allergic to diet. 😂👌

Already awake, but still unable to distinguish Maiara from Maraísa. 😂👌

In bed I do crazy things, like dropping my phone on my face while typing.😂😂

No one is forced to like me, after all not everyone is born with good taste.😂😙

I will stop mocking. Signed: me. This ticket is true! 😂😝👌

Hi, I’m fine, that’s just my taste in music. 😂😂😞

I have plans to be a fitness person in 2022. 2021 won’t work, it’s already very high! 😝😝

Make decisions drunk ok, make decisions when you’re horny, then it’s too much! 😂😂

It’s just that I lost my phone number… can I borrow yours? 😝😝

So if you guys date, I have a plug next to the bed! 😂👌

Who is asked to be the “you” of my “i love”? 😏😏

The only mouth I’m kissing this year is the mouth of the can… 😂👌

You like to be ashamed, right? Date me then, hahaha. 😂😂

I went to play wrestling with life and I’m getting beaten up so far!

For a shampoo that takes people out of their minds. 😃

Never underestimate my ability to see you on the street and pass right by. 😃😋

I went to shake the dust and turn around… then the rhinitis attacked me! 😂😒👌

My favorite position is standing in front of an ATM withdrawing money! 😝😝

Hey, hit on me again, now I want it! 😏😂👌

Whoever wants to like me has to be out of love! I don’t have money and beauty is in short supply! 😂😂

If I get rich, the first thing I’m going to do is wake up because I’ll already know it’s a dream! 😂👌

I’m not disorganized, I just give my things freedom to stay where they want! 😂😂

Poor is like a tire, the more you work, the smoother it gets! 😂😒👌

Tell me who you love and I’ll tell you who you’ll take in the tail! 😂👌

My biggest fantasy in bed? Sleep five days straight! 😂👌

A hungover man doesn’t want war with anyone.

Live each day as if it were your last, one day you’ll get it right.😅

Do not steal! The Government does not like competition.😂

I went to look at myself in the mirror and came face to face with the love of your life.

Nothing against you, but if you want to spend the rest of your life without appearing in front of me I appreciate it! 😃😋

Avoid frying, gluten, sweets and undecided! 😃😅

Find someone who understands me and then explain to me. 😃😅

I think my greatest gift is to spend 💵 and then regret it 😔

You think: No, the person can’t be so clueless…Yes, they can! 😝😎

Suspend the fries, because the fillet has arrived!😎😎

You who have already taken a course? what do you like? 😄😆

If you feel empty… Eat, you’re hungry! 👍✌️

Your message has been successfully received, viewed and ignored! 😘😘

If your problem is money and you don’t have money then you don’t have a problem 💵😉

I’ve been too busy being nice that I don’t have time to be nice. 😆😉

I would like to have a child one day… two days at most 😜😆

They say happiness comes from the little things…So look at your salary and be happy…😄😆

The day someone runs after me you can be sure, it’s robbery 😝😄

I’m more beautiful every day, sad news for those who hate me 👄👌

If it’s my fault, I’ll put it on whoever I want. 👌😏

Coffee to change what I can, wine to accept what I can’t. ☕️🍷

Let’s love the next, that the previous one we know didn’t work out. ❤️😌

Some date, some stay and I’m beautiful! that’s what matters…😎😄

I’m over it, I only cry when I remember. 😂😒

Work until the neighbors say “you can only be stealing”. 😂😂

How do you restart life, this one didn’t work. 😂😂

Waking up earlier to be late is my routine. 😂👌

Looking at my problems and not talking now, bro. 😂😒

I even warned myself… but I didn’t listen. 😂😒

Objective: food reeducation. Obstacle: food. 😂😂

If there’s competition, I’m quitting. 😂👌

I stopped with this business of one hand washes the other: it’s my turn, there’s never any water. 😂😒

Work hard to see if I can buy the patience I lack. 😂👌

I need new enemies, the old ones are starting to like me, I’m charming! 😂😂

A stray bullet has more direction than me! 😂👌

Sleepy I go to bed, sleepy I get up. 😂😒

Look, if there’s one thing I trust, it’s my distrust. 😂😂

I’m moving away from so many people, that in a few days the solution will be to talk to the plants. 😂👌

Horrible to be poor and not be able to break things when you’re angry. 😂😒

There’s not the slightest possibility that this will work… I’m in. 😂😂

The person with disrupted sleep wants war with just about everyone. 😂😒

If it’s not to be late, I’d rather not go. 😂😂

Guys, I’m just like a child, don’t promise me anything. 😂😒

We’ve barely arrived from New Year’s Eve and we’re already thinking about Carnival, we’re not worth anything. 😂😂

There’s not the slightest possibility that this will work….. I’m in. 😂😂

I became what I feared the most: whoever unmarks the ride to stay at home. 😂😒

Next year I’ll take a course, this year was just to test a business. 😂👌

What a complicated situation huh… I’m going to take a nap. 😂😂

The “you only live once” argument has already made me spend so much money.. 😂😒

I wish I didn’t become an aggressive bug when I’m hungry 😂👌

It must be very chic to work, study, go to the gym and still be able to sleep well 😂😂

So many days of fighting, I’m already getting violent… 😂😂

Hi, I noticed you only hang out with pretty people. Want to try something different? 😂😂

Do not argue. Say “you can believe it” and leave. 😂👌

I wanted a love triangle: me, an apartment and a good job. 😂😂

The young man when he is sleepy doesn’t want to talk to anyone. 😂👌

The mistake of the human being is to think that everything will work out! 😂😒

Let’s sleep that tomorrow has a lot of wrong decision to make. 😂😂

A life summed up in: “I wasn’t going to buy anything, but it was on sale”.. 😂😒

Erasing the conversation and pretending the person never existed, that’s how I live. 😂😂

You want to be happy, ok, I’m here. Now if you want to continue suffering, I can do nothing 😂👌

Go to shit but go down the sidewalk cause I care about you baby 😂😂

I was born with the curse of laughing in serious moments. 😂😒👌

What part of “I need to save money” I don’t understand?! 😂😂

Guys, seriously, I’ve been single for a long time, I don’t have an ex to get over, no, you can hit on me! 😅😅

Alas me doing exactly what I said was wrong to do.. 😂👌😒

I wanted to sleep with the ones I like, but unfortunately not everyone fits in my bed. 😂😂

Give me back the ML of perfume I used to look good…