Can we make someone fall in love with us? Science says yes!

Most of us have wondered: can I make someone fall in love with me? Studies carried out over many years have shown that, yes, we can awaken love in certain cases. In fact, scientifically speaking, passion is nothing more than a basic psychological emotion, like fear, joy, compassion, etc. So, how to learn to awaken in the other a feeling of love and affection with some psychological tricks?

O awesome.club will show that love may not be exactly a matter of ‘destiny’, but a joint work of biological, chemical and psychological mechanisms that can be studied, learned and successfully used for their own ends.

The important thing is to keep in mind that the other person must feel at least a little sympathy for you, of course. Then it will be possible to transform this into real and deeper feelings.

Social psychologist John Bargh, who works at Yale University, one of the most important in the USA, is mainly dedicated to the study of the role of automatism in social behavior. Several of his studies have revealed a curious natural relationship between human body temperature and psychological state. The result is that when we feel physical heat, we tend to behave with other people in a more affectionate and friendly way.

And you can use this to your advantage, for example, on a first date, when it’s especially important to make a good impression on the other person, giving preference to hot dishes and drinks, so that it’s easier to captivate your maybe-future-boyfriend. In fact, the trick works in many cases, such as a business meeting where you need to please.

A psychologist from the famous Harvard University, in the USA, Zick Rubin, in one of his studies, proposed to find out if it is possible to measure love. He found the answer in looks, or rather, in their frequency and duration. The psychologist found that, during a conversation, a couple deeply in love looks at each other 75% of the time, and that when someone dares to invade their privacy as a couple, they both look away from each other very slowly and reluctantly. In contrast, in ordinary conversation, people look at each other between 30 and 60% of the time.

But looking in the eye can be a consequence of passion as well as its cause. By looking at someone with the same frequency and duration, you will “trick” the human brain, because you will remind it that this is a passionate gaze. Therefore, it will make the person unconsciously assess that the thing is in a romantic field. Due to this, the nervous system will begin to produce the hormone phenylethylamine, which, in turn, generates the feelings that we experience during the first stages of passion, the famous “butterflies in the stomach”, sweaty palms, racing heart. … How to resist it?

It is obvious that an open and sociable person has more opportunities to win the sympathy of others than a shy and sullen person. So there’s nothing surprising in the fact that by excitedly sharing details about your life, you skew the interlocutor in your favor.

In a survey carried out by scientists at the Harvard Business School, in the USA, 79% of the participants preferred a meeting with a sincere person, who is not afraid to hide something. Sincerity works in the same way as secrets: when we tell, a special connection emerges between us and the interlocutor, based on trust and understanding.

When we do a good deed or a favor, we feel better. We are satisfied with ourselves and feel very positive emotions for the person who has just received our help. To justify our actions or expenditures, we tend to idealize the object of our generosity (in this case, the person who received it) and convince ourselves that this someone is more worthy of receiving our kindness. As a result, an emotional anchor is created and the person comes to admire us even more.

Therefore, it is worth taking this psychological effect into account and repressing the desire to give gifts to the loved one a little.

We are talking about all sorts of specific jokes, words and gestures that are born out of intimacy between people when they find a common interest or become closer. Maybe they like the same movies and series, books, songs or a simple meme. Or, even, the joke came naturally during a walk or a boring class. These are things that should not be ignored.

Having found, fixed and used these elements in their daily communication, the two will take the relationship to a more “serious” level and there will be more intimacy. This was the conclusion that scientists from the University of Texas, in the USA, reached in their research. We all want to be special and unique, and this unique language allows us to be not just “one more”, but the only one with whom this level of mutual understanding exists.

In research conducted in the 1960s and 1970s, scientists studied the effect of pupil size on a person’s attractiveness. A man was shown 2 photos of the same woman. The photos were identical, except for one small detail: in one, her pupils were dilated. Most men rated the woman in this photo as more sympathetic. Datelhe: this happened without any of them having noticed the difference in the eyes.

This effect can be used to our advantage. Of course, you cannot influence the size of the pupils themselves with sheer willpower, but it is possible to create the right conditions. For example, simply dim the sunlight. Think, beforehand, of a restaurant or bar with a ‘half-light’ atmosphere – which, by the way, is already romantic, regardless of the effect on the pupils…

Of course, it is necessary to spend time together, especially in the beginning. This is important so that people can get to know each other better and establish contact; to have time to perform the actions mentioned in the paragraphs already mentioned in this article and, in general, to understand if the game is worth it. But after a series of dates, psychologists recommend stepping back a little (even if it’s the last thing you want to do). This move is positive for several reasons:

prevents the person from overloading. We know that over time, feelings cool down a little. So, so that they don’t end for good, it’s necessary to move away and be less available for a while; gives the person the opportunity to realize how pleasant your company is and how important you can be to them (in fact, according to the “principle of lack”, rare, unique or limited objects have a greater importance for them). people); it gives you the opportunity to control your own emotions and coldly think about whether or not it’s worth moving on with the relationship.

A methodical and persistent repetition of the same thoughts and attitudes can program another person’s brain according to our desires. That’s why it’s so important to choose the right words and expressions when communicating with people who are important to us.

If someone says your name in a group of friends, what do you think people will think of first? Will they associate you with a determined, happy, self-assured person, or perhaps sad and isolated? The better the impression you make, the more positive thoughts you will cause the person of your choice, even when you are not around. And it doesn’t matter if you’re really that positive (always flaws). The main thing is how they perceive you and, even more importantly, how you want to be perceived.