10 Rules of Etiquette Involving Friendship and Money

Almost everyone knows that it’s impolite to ask someone else’s salary. We all try to avoid, at least occasionally, answering that question in conversation with a stranger. However, sometimes we ourselves are not aware that we put others in uncomfortable positions because of our curiosity or certain attitudes. This can be avoided if you know a few simple rules of etiquette related to the world of money.

O incredible.club selected 10 situations in which knowledge of these rules of etiquette relating to money is necessary for anyone.

Talking about how other people use their money is not only impolite, but also absurd. If you propose to a friend to accompany you on a trip and he refuses, your comments like: “But if your salary is twice as much as mine, let’s go!” they won’t change your mind, but the relationship could deteriorate. You may not know what the person’s economic situation is (whether it’s debt, credit, savings for an intervention, and the like), even if the person is a good friend.

Also, avoid judging other people’s expenses, even more so behind their backs. Yes, it may seem illogical that your friend visits a very expensive hairdresser, since he can pay half as much for the same services. Yes, you would spend that money differently. But it’s his choice and his money, not yours.

If you know your friend is paying off a loan or saving up for a vacation, don’t insist on going to an expensive restaurant. It’s better to ask where she would like to go: that way she won’t have to refuse or feel uncomfortable.

If you organize a collection for a joint gift from friends or colleagues, do not think that the same amount will be ideal for everyone. Imagine: someone may have 20 reais available for the gift, but they ask for 50 reais, not to mention that for some people, this collection of money can be something totally unexpected. Therefore, it is better to ask everyone in advance how much they are willing to spend, and then collect the money corresponding to this information.

When splitting a bill at a restaurant or bar, make sure there are no people between you who barely ate or drank nothing. Someone may not like the ordered dish, but someone could refuse the wine. No one wants to pay extra for someone else’s snacks or drinks, so in this case, it’s best to pay for your own.

Yes, this excellent photographer or seamstress is your friend, but your relationship with her does not mean an automatic discount. A person, in doing something for you, uses your time and resources, so it’s right and fair that you pay for your work as you should and what it’s worth.

You have wanted to buy a new TV for a long time, but prices have unexpectedly risen. Yes, it is unpleasant, but even more frightening is hearing such complaints when it has been two months since a person has been able to afford a simple microwave oven. So avoid these conversations if you don’t want your friend to feel even worse.

In general, it is worth remembering one universal rule: no matter how much you know about the income, debts, expenses or loans of others, always discuss economic issues with caution and understanding.

People, sooner or later, remember that it’s impolite to be interested in other people’s salaries, but they don’t hold their tongue when they ask other questions like: “How much does this apartment cost?”, “Are these shoes expensive?” , “How much did you spend on your trip?” Keep in mind that by asking this type of question you can put your interlocutor in an awkward position. Forget these questions, and if your curiosity doesn’t allow you to sleep peacefully, look up prices on the Internet.

When asked these questions, remember that you are not obligated to answer them. Just politely say, “I wouldn’t want to discuss this.” Or ask the opposite question: “Why are you interested?”

In an idyllic world, no one needs to borrow money or lend it, but if you have to, be categorical in saying when you can return it and stick to your word. If you don’t know when you’ll be able to return the money, make that clear. Do not be offended if you are denied: friendship is friendship, but no one is obliged to patronize it.

Some people strictly adhere to the policy of not lending money to friends or relatives, and in part this maintains their rational side. If you’re okay with this practice, make sure the situation doesn’t hurt your budget or your relationships. It is better to deny a friend something than to lose it later due to problems related to the return of money.

Of course, no one has to justify themselves, but if you choose to withhold something like this from a loved one, one suggestion is to say that you’re paying off a loan or saving up for a big purchase.

Maybe you just want to help, but don’t teach other people how to manage their economic resources. Maybe you really know how best to save or avoid borrowing, but your financial advice will only be welcome when someone expressly asks you to. In other cases, when unsolicited, such comments will only cause irritation. Especially if you are not willing to help the person financially if they don’t know how to manage it.

As a general rule, in economic matters, it is enough to act politely. Try to stick to this simple rule, and if someone violates it, don’t be afraid to defend your personal boundaries.

Do you have something to add to this list? Share with us in the comments.