Jealousy in Relationship: What to Do to Control it?

Some say the jealousy in the relationship it’s a spice, while others say it only gets in the way of the relationship. In any case, feeling suspicious is something that makes anyone anxious. And seeing the other with that feeling is not always nice.

Jealousy in a relationship can greatly hinder the happiness of the couple.

Therefore, below we will explain what jealousy is, what types it is, why we feel it and how this feeling can get in the way of a relationship. Check out!

What is relationship jealousy and what are the types?

O jealousy is a psychological reaction quite complex that, in fact, is linked to our instinct to preserve an important relationship, regardless of whether it is family, friends or affective.

Therefore, it is a hard feeling to understand and deal with the situation, as it causes a feeling of paranoia, insecurity and fear of losing someone important. Generally, this feeling is linked to a factor that generates distrust, such as a breach of trust, betrayal, termination of a very important bond, among other things.

Knowing this, we must understand that jealousy is a natural, common condition that does not offer great problems. However, not all types of jealousy are healthy and some of them can get in the way of a relationship. relationship loving.

The best known types are: unhealthy, possessive, retroactive and obsessive jealousy. Here’s a little more about these types of feelings and what they can represent in a relationship.

1. sick

Also called pathological jealousythis is the type of exaggerated jealousy that affects different areas of a person’s life. Therefore, it is not a healthy feeling and can end a relationship and even make it an abusive relationship. This kind of jealousy in the relationshipit is a feeling that makes the person feel insecure all the time and starts to chase the partner.

2. Possessive

O possessive jealousy goes beyond excessive distrust. It is characterized by a feeling of possession, where the person believes they own the other and wants to control everything in the person’s life, including the clothes they should wear, the place they should work, who they should talk to, the friends they has, among other things.

3. Retroactive

This is the famous jealous of the past or even the jealous of ex. It’s a kind of jealousy in the relationship very often, especially at the beginning of a relationship. It occurs when one or both feel insecure about the other’s past life. That is, ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, ex-wife, ex-husband and even the family built with the ex. Depending on the situation, it can negatively affect the relationship.

4. Obsessive

It is an obsession created by the person who feels that feeling. It’s a mixture of possessiveness with retroactivity and even pathology. The partner becomes the center of the person’s life and everything is cause for jealousy. This kind of feeling can end not only the relationship but also the person who feels it.

Why do we feel jealous in the relationship? Is it normal to have this feeling?

There are many reasons for one person to be jealous of another, but the main one is the insecurity. When a person doesn’t feel safe with himself, doesn’t believe in his own potential and thinks he’s not good enough, he ends up being suspicious of everything all the time, but without having any reason to.

Basically, it’s normal to have jealousy in the relationship. However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t something wrong with having this insecurity. So, see some causes of this feeling.

Lack of security

This is the most common reason, as it is directly linked to those who feel this feeling of mistrust all the time. Most of the time, the person feels this way because they are insecure with themselves.

Betrayal or breach of trust

When there is a breach of trust as there is in cheating, it is difficult to trust the partner again. Therefore, this feeling appears all the time as a defense not to go through the same problem.

behavior of the other

In some cases, the partner may have a behavior that makes the person insecure. When this happens, there is also a lack of respect for the relationship and a breakdown of trust.

emotional attachment

When the human being becomes dependent on the other, it is difficult to keep away or think about losing the loved one. Soon, this feeling often appears and becomes a reflection of emotional attachment.

Is there treatment for jealousy and distrust?

There is no specific treatment, but there are several ways to treat these self-defeating feelings. It all depends on the case, the level of mistrust and the situation experienced by each couple. But in cases where the symptoms of jealousy show an excess of control and obsession, psychological follow-up is necessary.

Jealousy: Physical Symptoms of a Jealous Person

You can usually tell a person is jealous by the way they talk, behave, mood swings, and look. Therefore, the jealous person does not like to see the partner talking to another person, demands satisfaction about where he was, among other things.

Sick jealousy: symptoms that something is wrong

If the person can no longer live, if the jealousy in the relationship is increasingly constant, is all the time suspicious of the other, wants to know where the partner is at all costs and lives a tremendous paranoia, is certainly showing symptoms of a pathology.

Jealousy means love? Is jealousy a sign of love?

Some people try to justify jealousy by saying it is a sign of love. However, it is important to differentiate one feeling from the other. Just because a person loves doesn’t mean they should “keep their eyes open” all the time on their partner. In the same way, it is not because the person feels that jealousy that is the fear of losing exclusivity, that he has stopped loving his partner.

Therefore, both feelings can coexist, but they are different and one does not necessarily depend on the other.

Is jealousy in a relationship harmful?

Most relationships experience some level of jealousy. However, several marital problems can start because of this feeling of mistrust. When the feeling begins to control the person who feels it and affects the relationship, then that jealousy in the relationshipit becomes harmful.

Are relationship jealousy and insecurity the same thing?

Basically, jealousy is the same as insecurity. This is because the feeling is driven by the fear of losing the other, of losing exclusivity, of being put aside, of losing space, among other things. Therefore, we can see that there is an insecurity behind it, as well as possessiveness.

How to control jealousy? How to deal with jealousy in a relationship?

There is no simple guide to how to stop being jealous in the relationship. If it were that easy, no one would want to feel jealous in the relationship, after all, this feeling makes any person distressed. However, there are some tips you can put into practice to control and deal with this feeling in your relationship.

Raise your self-esteem

The simplest way to stop distrusting the other is to feel good, capable and important. Do it for you, so you can feel good and happy.

Always talk about your insecurities

Showing how insecure you feel about a situation can help you deal with the problem. That way, it will be easier for the other to understand your fears and help you in this situation.

rationalize your feeling

Insecurity is not at all rational, so try to look at jealousy in a relationship as a feeling that drives you out of your mind and makes you an irrational person. Therefore, maintaining rationality in the moment of anger is the best solution to deal with this problem.

How to get rid of jealousy in a relationship? How to deal with someone else’s jealousy?

Many women seek help saying: he’s jealous of me, what do I do? However, it is difficult to end this feeling, if it is based on an insecurity of the other. However, here are some tips that can help you deal with your partner’s insecurity.

Talk to your partner

The best way to solve a problem is to talk. So, establish a dialogue and show that you are open to talking about your insecurities. Don’t get caught up in the anxiety of wondering what’s going on, just talk. That way he will have more confidence in saying what he thinks and how he feels.

Be transparent and trustworthy

If it is already difficult for the other person to trust you, then it is important that you are transparent and trustworthy. The other must see you as an open book in order to deal with this feeling and mature trust in the relationship.

Stimulate Emotional Intelligence in Others

The ultimate solution to dealing with jealousy issues is developing Emotional Intelligence. So talk to your partner about it and do exercises that allow for this development.

If you are having problems in your relationship because of jealousy, know that you can also turn to Spiritual Help. Schedule your Spiritual Consultation right now here at to better understand everything that is happening in your relationship.