Only tell her you love her when you really mean it

You’re getting ready to meet some friends for a drink or two at that bar down the street. You can’t wait to tell them about this new girl you’ve fallen in love with.

After telling your story, with a lot of emotion on his face, one of your friends asks a question that leaves you completely off guard — not because you weren’t expecting it, but because there’s a very high chance that you won’t know what to answer. “I’m happy for you, but what do you love about her? What makes you so special, huh?”

Your mind is whirling through thoughts, and you’ll probably blurt out the first plausible answer that comes to you, lest you run the risk of seeming like you’re invalidating your feelings.

The dilemma here has never been about what love itself is, but more about this generation’s understanding of what constitutes real love. We get into relationships and, in such a short time, confess our love to our partners without really understanding what that word means.

Because if our feelings, however strong they may seem, aren’t true, then what are they?

We feel the need to put a label on them, why what if people or even our partners ask us what they are? But do we really need to put a label on it? Do our feelings, however complex they are, deserve to be confined to the constituents of a specific label, however profound it may seem? No… I don’t think so.

When you love her, you love her for the person she is and not the person you were looking for or the person you want her to be. You might not like everything about her, but you still love her with all your heart because you understand that, at the end of the day, she’s the one you want to spend the rest of your life with literally.

All I’m asking you is to be truly honest with your feelings and how you communicate them to her, because that’s the least she deserves from you.