How to address wedding invitations correctly

Making a wedding guest list is no easy task. At this time, the bride and groom need to make some decisions and make adjustments to the initial plan, such as reducing the number of guests and balancing the will of the parents and the bride and groom.

Although difficult, it is possible that the mission is accomplished. But as the wedding is an incredible marathon, get ready, because after the list comes a new mission: address the invitations correctly!

And doubts always appear: formal or informal? Can I deliver an invitation that is valid for my entire work department? Does the man’s name come before or after the woman’s in the invitation?

There are some etiquette rules that are valid when subscribing to invitations and that can help the bride and groom avoid the most common mistakes. Check out some tips from wedding consultant Myriam Letícia Kalvan from the blog Casando com Amor, about the correct address of invitations.

Rules that are golden

Singles: When inviting a friend or single friend, use the guest’s full name, no need for Mr. or Miss

Married: For married couples, the man’s name comes before the woman’s name. When inviting a couple without children or whose children are all married, or who have unmarried children who will not be invited, use the husband’s name and then the wife’s name, as in the example: “Mr. Antônio de Sousa and Mrs. or “Antônio de Sousa and wife”.

If the couple does not share the last name, you can put the two separately “Mr. Antonio de Sousa and Mrs. Maria Carvalho”.

Couple and family: When inviting a couple and all the members who live in the house, or parents and their children, use the expression “and family” right after the man’s name. Example. “Mr. Antônio de Sousa and family”, “José Martins and family”.

Children of couples: It is best for single or married adult children who do not live with their parents to receive their own separate invitations. “The expression ‘Extensive to married children’ is no longer used”, guides Myriam.

Singles and family members: When inviting a single person and the invitation is extended to family members residing in the house, remember that you should not write “and family”, but “and family members”. Example: “Luísa Maia and family members”.

Co-workers: If you want to invite co-workers, it is recommended not to put an invitation on the wall, after all it is not explicit who you are inviting. Make individual invitations for each person you really want to invite and if they are married the invitation should include the name of the husband or wife.

Relatives, godparents and close friends

“When inviting parents and in-laws, you can use a more affectionate way, such as ‘To dear parents Angelina and José’. The same is true for uncles and grandparents: ‘Dear Uncle Jorge and Aunt Joana’, ‘Grandpa Gilmar and Grandma Francisca’”, guides Myriam.

Groomsmen can also receive an affectionate address. You can use the expression “To dear godparents”, before their name. Such advice is also applicable in the case of the couple’s close friends. It is worth remembering that in these cases the use of nicknames should be avoided.

Formal or informal?

According to Myriam “currently, a more informal treatment of some relatives and close friends is already acceptable, especially if the marriage is also more informal. However, some protocols are still followed”.

It is always important to consider what type of wedding ceremony is being organised. If it is an intimate, informal ceremony and for few guests, the invitations can be more informal and without the use of “Mr. e Sra.”, but if the party is more social, the ideal is to keep the formality. Respect for the guest and the type of wedding will always be decisive.

Also according to the consultant, if the wedding is quite traditional, it is interesting to use Mr. and Ms., with surnames, in all invitations: “if you do not know the surname, find out, it is better for you to show care in asking than carelessly arriving without a surname.”