How to act if your daughter doesn’t want a 15th birthday party

The 15th birthday party is one of the most dreamed moments by many teenagers. Every detail is handpicked: invitations, dresses, souvenirs… However, what if the long-awaited party is more a mother’s dream than a daughter’s?

According to the psychiatrist specializing in children and adolescents at the Instituto de Psiquiatria da
University of São Paulo (USP) Marisol Sendin, the mother shouldn’t insist if her daughter doesn’t insist on a debutante ball. “For many teenage girls, being introduced to society at a debutante ball was (and still is) important; for others, winning a women’s soccer championship or going on a trip is more valuable,” she says.

For Marisol, we all have dreams and it’s common to see mothers (and fathers) transfer these ideals to their children, whether it’s possibilities for study, career, purchase of consumer goods or a 15th birthday party with everything you’re entitled to. However, not all teenagers have the debutante ball as their biggest dream. “The important thing, always, is the loving dialogue between mother and daughter, especially in this phase when the girl is defining her identity and discovering what she wants”, she says.

So talk to your daughter, but don’t let your dream influence her choices. The most important thing is that she enjoys this date in a happy way!