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Femininity is part of my body

People talk a lot about femininity performance, but I think: what performance or lack of performance is this that everyone insists on pointing out? Are my lack of makeup, dress and high heels, among other props and behaviors, the requirements that make me not have this femininity?

Who defines whether I am feminine or not? Who created the concept? Who established all these norms that imprison me in a “little box”? “Little box” that determines what I am and what I can or cannot do. This same “box” is what determines which professional areas I should follow (or not follow), how I should behave, how I should talk, walk, sit and, mainly, who I should kiss, with whom I should have affection and build a family. . They try to stop me at all times from building a bond with an equal, with another woman.

I have always wondered what kind of femininity they are talking about, which they are imposing from a distorted, sexist, misogynistic and colonizing perspective.

The interesting thing about all this is that today there is a lot of talk about plural masculinities, different forms of masculinity, but not about femininity in the plural. Wouldn’t this be the time for us to discuss that too? No singular femininity, but plural, comprehensive and free femininity.

Some say that my “lack of femininity” makes me masculinity. Everyone insists on attributing a masculine virility to my body, which is unrealistic. These concepts are archaic and imprisoning. My body in the world goes beyond any understanding and deserves to live outside this prison of the social imaginary. I deserve to be free exercising femininity in my own way, not masculinity, masculinity is not for me, I don’t see myself in it, I am not it.

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I’m feminine. I am feminine in my own way. I don’t follow that femininity that many are used to, but an unrestricted femininity, in which I can wear what I want, behave as I want, talk and walk as I want and, above all, love another woman.

* Alaine Santana is a psychologist and speaker who seeks to give visibility to black lesbians, especially bofinhas and truck drivers – as she herself defines it. Follow Alaine on Instagram at @lesbicanegraecaminhao.

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