A day in the life of a family mother through the eyes of an artist who draws attention to an important problem

Emma, ​​a French artist, publishes fun comics on her blog. Her creations are not mere images, but serious reflections on some of the problems faced by today’s society. We decided to present one of the artist’s most impressive comics, called “You should have asked”. It describes a drama that almost all mothers know well.

Incrível.club warns: it is likely that, after checking out this comic, you will have a heated family discussion. Initially, it caused such passionate reactions from readers (and particularly female readers) of Emma’s blog that the author even published a book on the rights and duties of women in the family, called Psychological overload: a feminist comic (free translation). Believe me, this book has nothing to do with radical feminist propaganda. It just calls attention to an issue that many families avoid talking about. We hope that, after reading this post, you and your partner will draw the right conclusions, and that the family bond will become even stronger.

The comic begins with a small but revealing scene. Once, a friend of Emma’s invited her to dinner. When Emma arrived at the woman’s house, she was greeted by the other woman’s husband, while she was preparing dinner and looking after the children.

While the friend’s husband and Emma chatted happily in the living room, the hostess let something burn in the kitchen. The husband and the guest went to see what was happening, and they came across a somewhat somber image.

Then comes her husband’s response, which Emma finds typical of many young parents.

“When a man waits for his partner to ask him to do something, it’s because he sees her as a kind of dummy.and housework manager. A manager who always knows what to do and when to do it. The problem is that planning and organizing all matters related to the home takes the same amount of time as a full working day in an office”. writes Emma. In the end, the woman ends up being responsible for organizing and executing almost all the housework.

A typical woman’s day goes something like this.

However, in general, women do not only have to take care of the house and children, but also their own work outside the home. They try to do everything they had planned, without forgetting anything. Emma calls it psychological overload🇧🇷 “It is constant and very tiring work, although it is almost always invisible”, says the artist.

Then, the author reflects on the distribution of responsibilities in the family, something that is not born, only that boys and girls are raised in very different ways. From a very early age, girls are given toys in the form of dolls, pots, etc. But most people will find it strange a boy playing with these objects. No matter how far the world has advanced, in the consciousness of the masses, the mother of the family is still considered the main guardian of the home, with tedious responsibilitieswhile the man is seen as a “hero” in search of adventures, whose “exploits” are carried out mainly outside the home.

And although nowadays women work as much as men, they are often still the only ones responsible for household chores. Unfortunately, men do not always reflect on this. “We see mothers who act as household managers, while fathers just wait for instructions”says Emma.

Emma draws attention to the following point: many times, the man takes requests for help literally, doing exactly what was asked. “When I ask him to wash the baby’s bottle in the sink, he only washes the bottle, leaving the rest of the dishes there. Doesn’t realize it’s time to change the child’s diaper until he asks. And she never prepares separate food for the baby, for example.” These are some examples given by Emma’s friends. Maybe men just don’t realize that they are doing only a small part of what needs to be done. Despite this, obviously, many women already feel satisfied to receive any kind of help.

“I know several parents who have no idea how to feed or dress a child, despite having several children,” says the artist.

Here, the tip is just one: don’t be afraid to leave the child alone with the father. If a small catastrophe happens, the two will end up more united and learning from each other.

At the end of the comic, predicting the men’s discontent, Emma writes: “You might say that in your family things are different, but the overall picture is disappointing. According to the French Institute of Statistics, women spend 2.5 times more time taking care of household chores than men”.

How to change the situation?

Emma proposes that the young parents take care of the baby as much as possible from the first days of life🇧🇷 If possible, take a break from work during the first few months, which are the most difficult.
The fairest thing is to share the housework with the woman or to do it in shifts. Instead of criticizing the wife for the mess at home, you need to help her, as it is not easy for her. In addition to the fact that, many times, she is a woman and simply cannot afford to do everything.
Educate your children to be tolerant and not grow up with stereotypes that certain things should only be done by women or by men. women must give husbands more opportunities to control their activities independently, and not checking whether they vacuum the corners of the wall or how they bathe the children. Thus, men will be more willing to help.

And in your family, how do things happen? Is there an agreement on the distribution of household chores?