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9 tips to be more charming

The word charm is often associated exclusively with a person’s appearance or the way they dress. But the truth is that being charming is much more related to a person’s attitudes, personality and values ​​than to their physical characteristics.

Comments such as, “So-and-so is not so handsome, but he is very charming” or, “My boyfriend is not the most handsome man in the world, but he has a charm that won me over”, among others, reinforce the idea that charm is much more than beauty!

It is also worth noting that the concept of charm is relative. For example, you might find a coworker super interesting and a friend of yours not having the same opinion of him. And vice versa! After all, just like in the judgment of what is more or less beautiful, there are an infinity of different opinions!

It is important to understand, above all, that being charming does not necessarily mean attracting the attention of someone of the opposite sex… This can actually be a consequence. After all, a charming person carries with them characteristics and attitudes that make them relate better to others, regardless of where they are (whether at work, at university or, simply, at a party). That way, the trend is to always win more friends, co-workers and, of course, flirts!

Sounds confusing?! But it is not! In general, being charming comes down to: being authentic, having an opinion and not letting yourself be influenced, but without forgetting to respect the other and treat all the people in your life with politeness.

But if you still have doubts about whether or not you are a charming person, check out some tips below – simple, but – that can help a lot. That way, you’ll find out if you’ve been acting naturally with charm or if you can try a little harder to do so. It’s worth paying attention!

1. Show interest in what the other says

Are you talking to a friend at work or in a bar, for example?! Remember to look him in the eye when he’s telling you something, it shows that you’re interested in the conversation, regardless of what the subject is (it can be a personal report, an outburst, a professional opinion, etc.).

After all, there’s nothing more unpleasant than the feeling that you’re talking to a person who’s paying attention to everything around them except what you’re saying, right?

On the other hand, few things are as charming as noticing that the person you’re talking to (whether it’s a friend, girlfriend, or crush) has a genuine interest in hearing everything you’re saying.

2. Ask questions

Listening is essential, whether in an informal conversation between friends or boyfriends, or even at an important work meeting. In addition to looking them in the eye, one way to show interest in what the other person is saying is to ask questions related to the topic (of course, this should be done in a timely manner, that is, without you having to interrupt them).

If a friend is telling you, for example, about an ex-boyfriend, you can ask her how long the relationship lasted or, depending on the intimacy between you, what was the reason for the breakup.

If the conversation about an old relationship is with a co-worker, with whom you are still not so close, ask less intrusive questions like, “Have you never seen her since the breakup?” etc. The important thing is to use common sense, taking into account the degree of friendship that exists between you.

If the conversation is still exclusively work-related, clear all your doubts around the topic, really showing interest in what is being talked about.

It is worth noting that, in all the cases given as an example, the conversation must occur naturally. After all, a charming person should not act in a “forced” way.

3. Be punctual

It doesn’t matter if you’re going to work, for a meeting, or just having dinner with your friends. Whenever there is an appointment, respect it!

It may seem silly – especially in the case of informal meetings with friends or a boyfriend – but this is an attitude that really makes a difference, as it is nothing more than a sign of politeness and respect for others (fundamental points in a charming person). )!

4. Praise

That doesn’t mean you have to go around distributing compliments to everyone you meet throughout the day: “Good morning, So-and-so, you look great today”; “Hello dear, I love your outfit” etc. This would probably sound like an exaggeration and some people would even be suspicious of the sincerity of such comments.

But, if you notice a friend’s or crush’s new haircut, and really approve of the result, why not say you liked it?!

If you think your co-worker’s idea is really innovative, be sure to let them know!

Compliments, when sincere and detached from individual interests, are very positive and make any relationship (friendship, professional, affective) much more pleasurable!

5. Practice empathy

Empathy is summarized as the ability to psychologically put yourself in the other person’s shoes, to try to feel what he would feel in a given situation.

Of course, maybe, in some situations of great suffering, for example, you can’t get much idea of ​​how the person is really feeling. But, of course, you can offer to listen to her and help her in any way possible.

Practicing empathy implies that you shouldn’t do to others what you wouldn’t want them to do to you. This practice also leads to a better understanding of people, strengthening any type of relationship and making the environment much more pleasant.

And if your question is: what does empathy have to do with charm? Know that this ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes is very important, as it creates a quality in you that makes other people feel welcomed and safe around you.

6. Have a sense of humor

That doesn’t mean cracking jokes all day or laughing at everything you’re told. But it is a habit that makes your routine – and that of all the people you live with – lighter and more pleasant.

To do this, talk about informal matters, laugh whenever possible, make (healthy) jokes with friends you are very close to and receive, in a kind and fun way, jokes that they eventually make with you.

7. Be nice

Don’t use your politeness only with the people you live with, be kind, whenever possible, to your acquaintances and even strangers! How about smiling and exchanging a few words daily with the doorman of your building, for example? Or offer to help an elderly person who has difficulty carrying his groceries? Or still, give up your chair, in the doctor’s waiting room, to a pregnant woman?

Remember to be polite and friendly on the phone, no matter where you are calling. In her circle of friends, she is always willing to help and listen to her friends. When you’re at a party or club and you notice that someone you know in the class isn’t that into it, bring it up and try to make him feel more comfortable.

But these are just a few suggestions! Being nice means, above all, being kind to everyone and always being open to making new contacts and/or friendships.

8. Always seek to learn more

Have you ever stopped to notice that, probably, every person you know and consider charming likes to talk about the most varied subjects?! That’s because intelligence, knowledge, are really charming factors.

However, demonstrating knowledge about a certain subject does not mean, in any way, being arrogant. Interesting is that person who talks about what he has mastered, recognizes what he has not yet learned, talks about his doubts and, above all, shows that he always wants to learn more.

9. Dress well

Dressing well does not mean using only designer clothes, but rather dressing according to your style, your preferences and always taking into account the occasion: work, outings, dinner, nightclubs, parties, etc.

And in this sense, dressing well also makes you a more charming woman, since it is essential to feel good about yourself, with your appearance, to be a more confident person and, consequently, attractive.

All the above tips are important, but, of course, the main guideline is: be yourself! Never change your personality to please someone or to be “well accepted” in a certain environment, but always be flexible, polite and open to meeting new people!

With Knowledge Comes Wisdom

Walk comfortably in both Darkness and Light with these digital Books of Shadows:

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