8 Tips for Staying Calm When Dealing With Unpleasant People

Unpleasant people are everywhere: it can be a demanding boss, relatives who love to meddle in our lives, or fellow travelers who insist on making scandals on public transport. Researchers claim that communicating with these people can even affect our health and spread negative emotions like the flu. Fortunately, there are useful tricks to defend ourselves against the harm caused by people with these characteristics, making it more useful to communicate with them.

O awesome.club knows some techniques capable of neutralizing toxic people, and shares them in this post with you.

The principle of damping is a technique to avoid conflicts, and it was described in the book by Russian psychologist Mikhail Litvak, called Psychological Aikido🇧🇷 According to the principles of the book, the prevention and end of conflict occurs due to the redirection of the aggressor’s energy towards himself, as in aikido. In other words, after receiving a “psychological blow”, he behaves like a cat that falls from a high place: he becomes all good. This algorithm can be successfully applied in family, work and public life.

If your opponent accuses you, agree with his statement. But after a few detours in the discussion, the enemy will be disoriented by not receiving the reactions that were expected in the conflict.

“Reflecting” is a well-known psychological method. This is not a human invention, even chimpanzees resort to this tactic to communicate with their fellow tribesmen. Keep in mind that doing the reflex is a subtle and strategic move: your opponent can’t think you’re “mocking” his face.

When you repeat the interlocutor’s words, giving them their meaning, these words are perceived as the other’s. For an angry man, it is easier to listen to the arguments of others if, even in part, these justifications belong to him.

Calling someone for help doesn’t mean you’re hiding behind someone else’s back. Third party participation allows us to see the conflict in a new way, finding our way out of the impasse. From a neurobiological point of view, the dispute is a threatening situation, and the receptors responsible for arousing the parasympathetic nervous system begin to “sound the alarm.” This is when the mediator in the conflict must step in to assume the role of “lightning rod”, judging the situation without unnecessary emotions. Strictly speaking, it is as if the question were, in fact, decided by a judge of law.

Asking someone for help is not a sign of immaturity. On the contrary: demonstrates understanding of the laws of real life.

Pies are really sweet and delicious, and make those who like to eat well smile. Angry people often need that imaginary pie. Often, these people’s anger comes from insecurity, fear of losing prestige, resentment. Don’t be selfish: share a few pieces of imaginary pie with them. By indulging in something small, you can gain great benefits in the future.

In a conflict situation, try to make concessions. It is only important to remember that the request must be reasonable. Don’t allow yourself to be trampled.

Visualization is a powerful tool of psychology. It helps to achieve established goals, outline perspectives and imagine the results of the work. Psychologists from different schools use positive visualization to treat depression, panic attacks, and other disorders. But anyone can use visualization techniques to relieve stress and calm down.

But there’s no way to respond to an opponent who won’t even let you open your mouth. Then visualize. If you imagine your boss screaming in a pink tutu, it will be much easier to cope with the incessant flow of words and lectures.

Another way to defuse conflict is to offer the angry person something (candy, cookies) or a bottle of water. When you give something to your opponent, he feels the unconscious urge to do the same, giving something up.

Also, since ancient times, eating has had a sacred meaning. People who share a meal somehow become allies. For them, it becomes easier to find ways to reconcile. Also, it is very difficult to scream with your mouth full.

If nothing works and your emotional state goes from bad to worse, try isolating yourself. After all, you can’t take everything as a joke, and live explaining yourself or trying to understand your opponent. Maybe today is not your day, or maybe you are falling victim to an emotional vampire.

Build a wall (only in your imagination) and make sure no insults get to you.

Humor is unique because it helps you find ways out of life’s most difficult situations. A relevant joke, or a sentence that, at first glance, is not relevant to the situation and seems rather absurd, they are capable of interrupting the chain of unpleasant questions and destroying the armor worn by their unpleasant interlocutor. That way it will be much easier to talk.

Of course, one must learn the art of intelligently answering all questions. But for most of us, the brightest answers don’t arrive for a day or two. Relax, and everything will be fine.

What methods do you use to communicate with unpleasant people? Comment!