4 questions you should ask yourself before filing for divorce

Divorce is a very serious decision in a relationship. Before deciding to divorce permanently, it is necessary to reflect deeply on the reasons that have led you to think about opting for it.

First, understand that every couple has disagreements – more serious or less serious -, regardless of social level or how long the relationship has been. This is natural and necessary for the couple to mature with differences, learning to live with each other’s defects and qualities.

If your marriage has reached a critical point, before seeking a lawyer, try to honestly answer the four questions below. They can help you rethink your decision.

1 – Did I do everything in my power?

Just charging the other party for changes doesn’t solve the problem. It is necessary that you also made an effort so that the relationship could recover. Breaking up can often seem like an attractive alternative to everyday problems, but it may not be the best way to resolve things.

It is possible that the healthiest way out is to reassess what is bothering you and, even if you have already done a lot for your marriage, try one last effort to keep it alive, talking to your husband openly about the relevant issues that are bothering you.

2 – How would this decision affect my children?

When you think about getting a divorce, you need to understand that this decision is a very serious one and could affect other people besides yourself. If you have children, think about how they will be affected if you do decide to separate. Although many say that a peaceful divorce is better for children than a troubled marriage, divorces are almost never completely peaceful.

If you finally come to the conclusion that separation is really the best way out, talk to your children along with your husband to make sure they understand the real reasons that led you to decide this way. The more sincere the dialogue, the less likely they are to be traumatized from the process.

3 – Will divorce improve my life?

Evaluate your marriage honestly. Make a list of the things that bother you and, next to it, a list of the good things you live together. Compare them and evaluate the results: do the negatives outweigh the positives in number or severity? If not, it might be worth trying to get over the problems in the relationship.

Many people break up believing it will make them happier, but over time they come to realize that divorce didn’t solve all their problems as they imagined, it just created new ones. To prevent this from happening, think very carefully before taking a definitive action.

4 – Am I ready to face the consequences?

A breakup has many negative consequences. Even if you were the one who asked for a divorce, rest assured that it will not be easy. You will miss some things, you will miss and want to go back, and you will have to live with the difficulties that come with living alone, from then on.

In addition, there is the financial issue. Alone it is more difficult to organize your accounts and maintain the same standard of living. Of course, no one needs to stay in a bad relationship just for that reason, but if you hesitated on any of the items mentioned, maybe it’s time to give yourself the opportunity to have more time to think about whether you really want to. , get divorced.